Restarting....

I feel great! I just got back from Zumba...after 2 weeks of no exercise- wow- yes the aches & pains are already setting in. But today I restarted. I worked with Rosetta Stone on Spanish this morning, and found out we are restarting Spanish class for sure in Sept, probly on the 16th. Funny thing- while I was gone, the zumba class changed from 7-8; it moved up to 6:30-7:30- well this is bad because the new Spanish class is Mon & Wed, 5pm -6:30. So I decided, well ok, I'll just wear my work out clothes to class and leave 10 min early. (every time) Then I got to zumba and found out the teacher is leaving after this week to teach another class, in another park, from 7:30-8:30! Perfect!! I'll just change classes with her, then I have an hour between Spanish & zumba! Man I love it when things work out.

Because I want to do both. Learning Spanish is very important to me and I get better all the time. I also LOVE this free zumba class, and I can feel my body changing, and that inspires me to make better food choices. The two were about to bump into to each other and I was not willing to give up either. And then I hear about this change...not sure exactly how it will work out- I could stay with the 6:30 zumba on the days I don't have Spanish class- if I like the new teacher...or just switch to the later time...again I find myself in a place where all my options are good.

Everardo loves working out as well. When I met him, he was homeless, but he had a gym membership. I would drop him off at 24 hour fitness and he would work out for hours, take a shower, and head out to his spot. He was kinda homeless by choice. He was spending his time between the alano club going to meetings and the gym. The place where he stayed, under a bridge, was a little community, and he fed those guys alot of the time. Some were trying to get sober and he tried to support them as well. He's an amazing man, I find this out more and more all the time. He feeds guys here, too- the ones that show up on the trains, passing thru, usually trying to go to the U.S., where they think they will find jobs, a better life, the ability to take care of their families. But I digress- he loves working out. Tonite I think he jumped rope for 45 min straight! He runs and he does push ups & sit ups, pull ups...oh yeah I love to watch when he does these crazy pull ups, behind his shoulders...I do love men's muscle arms.....oooops slippin' again.

Anyway tonite after zumba a guy came up to me, and it halting English, asked me if I could help his wife with an interview in English. Of course I misunderstood and thought she needed help answering some questions- he said she just had 8-10 questions. Anyway I said sure. Everardo walked up then and he translated, and we said sure, when? Right then- oh ok- where? Right there, she was across the patio, and very pregnant. So it turns out she's in school and has an English class and wanted to interview me! oh..duh. So she asked me a series of questions and her husband filmed it. The really REALLY cool thing was- it was exactly the questions I taught in my class to the students to talk to their neighbors who are American or tourists they see or come in contact with!!!! I mean EXACTLY!
What is your name, are you here on vacation, what is your favorite thing about Rocky Point, do you like Mexican food, what is your favorite dish!! I was so happy to help her...and truly because I received affirmation about what I was doing.

So it was an awesome day. I feel good and good about myself. People at zumba asked me where I've been. It's not quite as hot tonite as it has been. We went to a meeting this morning and there were visitors and a newbie and it was a good meeting. We ate cheese and crackers later- the cheeses we bought while the girls were here (I shoulda sent it with them) a fresh cheese, very wet and kinda rubbery, and a harder cotija cheese, more dry and crumbly- also fresh. Now Poppi just brought us a little bit of beans mixed with a little fluffy rice topped with the crumbly cheese and a couple of tortillas. Perfect. Not to much, or too filling, a little protein from the beans a little carb from the rice and a little taste from the cheese. The perfect re-filler after a hard workout. I know tomorrow I'm gonna wake up in pain ha ha. Poppi told me to go easy with zumba tonite and I said of course, and then I pushed hard. Yeah I never learn. But man it must be the endorphins!! Cause I feel so good! I'm not thinking about how hot it is, or the sand sand sand...and hot it's gonna be this hot and hotter until the end of Sept...if I have zumba and classes to look forward to, then I'm good. And the class I teach also starts mid Sept, and you know what? If that doesn't continue to be a good thing, I can teach here. People have asked, and I mean people who could afford to pay 50 or 100 pesos...maybe I could charge those who can afford it, and keep it free for those who cannot....hmmm something to think about.

Well I'm dying to know how my daughter's first day of school for the medical assisting program went, but she's not answering her phone...aaarrgghhh. I hope her day left her feeling as great as I feel right now. We've been here in Puerto Penasco almost 10 months, it went by fast. It's very different than Playa Ventura to be sure, but of course any town/city bigger than 1000 people would have been very different. Maybe we stay here, but next year take a trip in August ha ha. Maybe down to Playa Ventura, or if the house sells before that, to Michocan (Morelia) to see Everardo's family. Oh but in July we'll be in northern Calif to see my beautiful daughter get married! Yep life is gooooood! Viva!

Mexico fun fact:
Mexican children do not receive presents on Christmas Day. They receive gifts on January 6, the day on which Mexicans celebrate the arrival of the Three Wise Men.

Did I say I don't have cancer?? I DON'T HAVE CANCER!! YIIIPPPEEEEEEEE
When I heard my results from my doctor, I actually started crying. I was with my older daughter and she started crying, too. The doctor called me himself, and it was only Thurs, 2 days after my little procedure, and at the time they promised to expedite the results- but yeah I heard that before- right? But he called me himself. Drewy and I were sitting outside a tiny cafe called Hallie's, waiting for our table and for Halla, who showed up minutes later. The relief was so huge- I think maybe I had been holding my breath for 2 weeks! I know "future tripping" is always a mistake, and yet I indulged in it constantly while waiting for the procedure and the results. If I had cancer-again- what did that mean? That I was a carrier? That I would just keep getting it in different areas? That I really might not get to watch my girls live their lives, fall asleep on my husband's shoulder, be a part of....? But it didn't happen, I'm clear, I'm good. I am not cancer susceptible! Did I say yipee?

So yes I'm a bit emotional right now. Happy to be healthy and excited to get back to zumba tomorrow, so my home Spanish lessons, to teaching English, and now to start with a group Sept 2 for Spanish lessons- with the teacher Laurie I had for a few weeks before the summer started.

I also miss my daughters, and am of course, AGAIN, thinking about where I want to live. But have come back to that middle ground of right here right now, we're good. I still want to check out Ensenada, but I promised myself last nite not to bring it up again for awhile. I know the heat is killing me, pushing me into the ground, and this morning my friend Pam remarked that in a few months it will be freezing cold. Hmmmm I think I've had enough of this f***ing desert ha ha. Yeah so much for I'm good for now. But it's evening- still really hot, but the ac is on in the bedroom- yeah that's the only place we have it- a mini split, with a fan at the door sucking it out here to the living room. And we're going for ice cream in a minute...maybe the last time for a while since we're both getting back to our exercise regime tomorrow. I love my husband, he knows me so well, he made me my favorite breakfast this morning, and we took a late nap in the ac this afternoon. I do want to stay in Mexico for now, maybe at least another year; if we go back I'll have to work- and I don' wanna!! Another month and it's supposed to be beautiful here, nice and warm, but not deathly hot like right now.

We started watching this series Breaking Bad, they just started it with the first season and it's on every nite at 10pm, even weekends, so it should go quick, but ha ha gotta go get ice cream before that. And it's so hot we're starting to stay up later again like in Playa Ventura, so it should be an interesting month. So this is a short post. I am happy, relieved, in love, loved, missing my kids already, but still holding the memory of them here; they loved Lucky, our newest member, and he really perked up with them. Sam of course was so happy they were here, and he swam more than they did at the beach. Hopefully next time they come to visit they'll bring Elena with them and I know Everardo will be sooooooo pleased. He loves my girls and always tries to be sure they're happy when they're with us, but to have Elena here as well...well wouldn't that just be icing on the cake?

I know I forgot the Mexico fun fact yesterday...but here's a new one:

 The red poinsettia (which the Aztecs called cuetlaxochitl) originated in Mexico and is named after Joel Roberts Poinsett, the first United States ambassador to Mexico (in the 1820s)
 

I haven't written in over a week; I was busy in Calif, and then my daughters came back down with me until yesterday when I dropped them at the airport in Phoenix. Ouch what a long drive from the border to the airport and back. I was yawning at the end and if Everardo hadn't been in Sonoyta waiting for me (at the border), I would have pulled over and closed my eyes for half an hour. It was 3 hours each way of boring desert-painful ha ha.

Well my medical stuff went very well. As it turned out I had another, bigger polyp way up inside my uterus- they saw it on the camera, and they cut it out. They expedited the labs so I got the results before I left Calif. Benign!! However if I had not had it taken out it would have started bleeding eventually and may have become cancerous. So good thing I went. And yes I could have had it all done here, much much much (did I say much?) cheaper...but I would have wondered if they missed anything. Not because I don't trust the doctors here, but because of the way they told it to me originally up there- that at first they missed it...so I felt like they knew exactly what they were looking for- and yes it's the same thing they would have found here. So I guess what I'm saying is I paid the big bucks for security...feeling confident....oh well as my mother would say.

The rest of the week was nice. Rex had a surprise dinner for Drew's birthday on Wednesday and her friends were all there as well as me, my ex and his wife, and fun was had by all. The next day she and I and Halla had breakfast and went to the movies to see this very silly movie called "The Millers". Drew and I went to the tattoo place and I had some tiny stars added to a tattoo I have on my arm and the word "esperanza" which means "hope" in Spanish- also very tiny. Ok the way we paid him was so funny. I have gotten the only tattoos I have done by this guy Tim, when I had breast cancer he did a small cancer ribbon on my shoulder- and did it for free- then gave the same tattoo free to both of my daughters. Anyway he tells me how much it is and usually I walk down the street to the atm to get the cash. So this time, he says.."how about $40.." and I say ok, hey Drew how much you got and she and I each had $7 dollars- I said ok I'll be right back- and he said- no $14 is good- hey what's that? I said pesos and he said cool- so I paid him $14, 60 pesos (a 50 peso bill and a 10 peso coin), and jokinly said hey I have some vicodin ha ha and he said ok cool...so I poured a handful from the perscription I just got at the doctor! $14, $60 pesos, handful vicodin!! What a deal!!

Then Friday or Sat we picked up Elena (Everardo's daughter) and went to breakfast in this cafe called Four Play ha ha, and the servers had this name tags like "Meggs & Bacon", and "Chris P Bacon"- too bad I can only remember the bacon names cause we were totally cracking up! So that was Halla, Drew, Elena and me. Then we went to the dollar store- which was amazing! I got 4 pairs of readers to bring home for a dollar each, and Drew got pieces to make a "crafts box" for Danica which she loved- this store is the bomb! Boxes of plastic bags, cleaning products, toys, all kinds of stuff. Then we went back to Drew's and Halla had to go get ready for work. But Drew, Elena and I went to the mall to shop- yes shop until you drop ha ha. Everardo wanted me to get Elena back to school clothes and I think she had fun- I let her and Drew go into Victoria's secret alone and I only came to the cash register...then shoes, jackets, pants, etc..we didn't get home until almost 7pm. Elena's mom is happy like me that Drew and Elena hit it off so well and also really happy that Elena met Halla this time, too. She wants them to be sisters and so do we. Drew was amazing with her, Elena is only 16 and Drew is 28 (wow my baby is so grown up), but Elena thinks Drew is totally cool. So the trip was worth it, if just for that.

Then the girls came back here with me to Puerto Penasco where the heat is on! We spent 2 days at the beach, but it was so hot there- luckily Poppi bought a couple of beach umbrellas, yippee, now I can use one with my hammock which ends up being in the sun all aftenoon and so unusable until evening. They fell instantly in love with Lucky, how was kinda shy the first day but really pepped up after that. Oh yeah and their flight was at 6am and mine not until 11am, but i managed to get on theirs- and the flight was packed- I guess Monday morning work commuters- but it was so full. I couldn't pay the $250 to change the flight over the phone or online, and I couldn't pay $75 to change it at check in, so they put me on stand by so I made it at no charge ha ha. (btw- I wouldn't have paid the $250). Then when we hit Phoenix at 8am- a friend of Rex's picked us up and drove us all the way to the border!!! And then wouldn't accept gas money (had to be at least $60). But he does want some shrimp so next time I go to Phoenix I'm gonna bring him some. It was funnt he opened his trunk and there were a bunch of 12 & 12 AA books, which I commented on. He has like 13 years and his wife 10 in the program and when I said I had 12, he started laughing and so we talked AA all the way to the border and the time went fast. There's a big convention here in Oct and he'll probly come down and then Everardo can meet them, too. Funny isn't it?

So we ran the ac in the bedroom all day with a fan pushing it out into the rest of the house- except the kitchen and dining room- there's a doorway to that area and Poppi hung his wool serape which is huge, covered the entire space to keep the cool. There's been a very light wind so it doesn't help much. I am totally waiting for the end of Sept (about 6 weeks) when it cools off thru Nov, then comes winter. So we shopped one day down on Mexico Rodeo drive, also called Cholla mall (pronounced choya) and the girls got everything they were looking for. They pointed out what they wanted and Everardo made the deals. Last time they were here we shopped on the malecon for small vases and trinkets and he made them do it themselves, but not haggle too much cause they prices were low and the vendors need the money. But here he did the talking and everyone walked away happy. Oh and both girls bought hammocks- the kind that look like a hanging chair...and they got them on the plane!! Everardo wrapped them in big green garbage bags which I was sure they pull apart at the border, but we only got a "have a nice day"- man we coulda smuggled anything- up to and including my husband!

Sam got lots of sisterly attention and Lucky perked up. He had been sick with a skin fungus and needed some vitamins and Everardo had been taking him to the vet, and he was feeling better, and started being really silly. We ate out except for breakfast and took them to our favorite places- all were outside stands..and they loved them! Burros longos, tacos (carne asada and pastor), quesadias, and at one place Everardo went around the corner to get a shrimp filled coconut for himself while we ate tortas and burritos. We ate, ate, ate.

So now I'm home with just the puppy dogs; Everardo is out walking the beach the poor bastard- it's got to be 110 degrees outside-and hotter at the beach. I say- forget it! Come home and hide inside the cool house with me! Ok it's not that cool- but better than outside. I hung the clothes on the line about an hour ago and I bet they're dry already! I haven't done my Spanish in 2 weeks except twice and that was in Calif- none here, haven't done zumba in 2 weeks either- ouch that's gonna hurt come Monday. But after this post I'll do Spanish. And I don't go back to the center to teach English for a month either. They're closing for 3 weeks and I took the girls out there to meet Karen and Eneida, see my classroom, and the puppies in the dog ministry, but I didn't have a class and so we decided that since I wasn't there for 2 weeks, then after next week they're closed for 3 weeks- to just not go for only one week- so I'm on teacher's vacation. Well I'm ok with vacation, and I'm really looking forward to getting back to zumba...but for today, after Spanish- I hope I have a good book to read all afternoon.......oh and a nap....yeah I miss the girls already, so my feelings are a bit of a mess, so I'll wait to write about that until next time...do I want to move back, move closer and stay in Mexico, stay right here, hmmmm my pea brain is too sleepy to consider in any coherent fashion right now...so...viva!

Sort of a dear diary post, fighting fear today

It's cold in northern California! That's just not right! The sky is gray and it's 10:30 in the morning. It's August, it's summer!!! Why is it cold. Luckily my daughter told me to bring some long pants, and well I would have brought one pair for sure, but I brought 2 pairs of levis, and a pair of light sweats that were for lounging in the evening, but may become part of my "go outside" wear ha ha. Yesterday I wore levis almost all day, did I mention it's August!!??

So I'm happy to be with my daughter. She will be 29 tomorrow and we can just talk non stop. She always has so much going on. And they'll have Danica, who's 4 I think, for the next few days...they have half custody I think, and I'm looking forward to that. Did I mention it's cold here? Yesterday I got almost all my errands done; tshirts, socks & underwear for hubby, so today is open for my "procedure". I am nervous, tryin' hard not to be. I have a pill I have to take an hour before, it's called somthing "pan"..you know those drugs that end in "pan" are always the anxiety drugs...ha ha maybe I should take it now. Just kidding, but I take that and 2 vicodins at 12:45, so in a couple of hours. Then I have to be there half hour ahead of the procedure, and she's gonna give me even more drugs...so of course now I'm thinking- wow is this going to hurt??

I don't want Drew to be scared, so I'm writing this instead of telling her. We laughed about mom being looped on pain meds...and I told that I'm good with the first vicodin, but when the second dose comes I usually throw up. This is a good thing...all I need is to fall in love with pain meds, right? I am an alcoholic in recovery with 12 years sober. I am in Alcoholics Anonymous, and I am grateful that pain meds make me sick! I'll take the first couple of doses then change to asprin unless I'm really in a lot of pain, but if that happens I'll probly call the doctor anyway cause I think I shouldn't be feeling too bad by tomorrow. What I really want to know if when will I hear the results? I mean the results that got me to here took almost 3 months...but I understand that now they know what they're looking for...

Yeah or maybe this is because I filed a grievance against the health insurance company for the last bill they sent me for $990!! To read..yeah- TO READ  a pathology report that said I was fine. I file a grievance saying they insisted I have this test, it should be covered...then a few weeks later the doctor emails me and says, oh I got a call from UCSF where I sent your labs for a "double check" and they think you should have this procedure.....so...what? Now will I get another bill for that double check test? Interesting that I haven't...the health insurance companies are SO full of shit. I know I've said this before...but it's all bullshit. The drug manufacturers and the insurance companies just bleed us dry. Since living in Mexico I can see this is the case. Yes I came back to Calif for this procedure, and it will use up my deductible so if I do have cancer or this hyper plasia or anything else and need treatment, it will be covered (free)...at least until Dec 31. But I know the results are going to say I'm fine. Maybe the Afforable Heathcare plan is not perfect, but you can change or improve something if you don't start. You can't just say it's broke and not try to fix it. So we'll see what comes next. I'm happy about the new plans rolling out, even though there are things I may not like- for example, I don't live in the U.S- will I be fined if I don't have insurance? There are millions of Americans not living in the U.S...so how will this work?

Ok enough of that. My beautiful hubby just called to tell me he loves me and not to worry. He updated me on Lucky- the new puppy who has been so itchy, and the new vet he took him to, and that he likes this guy. I told him how cold it is here and I'm ready to come home. Oh and now the sky is actually beginning to turn blue...yippee.

At 7am I went to an AA meeting down the street and man it was cold. They have it every morning so I'll try to go again before I go home. I ended up seeing someone I know and that was funny since I thought I was so anonymous here in Santa Rosa since I'm from a town a couple of town south...But my daughter has hot water and I took a wonderful shower. I'm gonna tell Poppi that we need to fill up the propane for the hot water, even if I just use it once in a while. I didn't know I missed a hot shower until I took one ha ha!! So time to get dressed again (after the meeting and the shower I reverted back to pajamas), and get ready to go. I also need to call my friends that are renting our house so I can stop by there, I guess maybe tomorrow or Thursday. Tomorrow I'm taking my daughter for a pedicure and a massage for her birthday...since I'm counting on feeling fine...power of positive thinking, right?

So I arrived about 7pm to San Francisco Sunday evening, had a wonderful Arabic dinner at my ex husband's- his wife is also Palestinian and also a great cook! They were so nice and came and picked me up at the airport, then Drew and her fiance met us at their house for dinner- then we came up here to Santa Rosa and went to bed.. After running around yesterday my younger daughter showed up here and we went to dinner, hopefully I'll see her again today. She's 20 and man do we clash! She and I had an unfortunate argument last nite at dinner, she accused me of "not motivating her enough" when she was in high school to go to college. She was also accusing her dad- not just me. Ha ha ha ha ha!! Please don't play such a pathetic victim card with me. We supported you in everything you did, always wanted you to go to college, thought it might even be on a soccer scholarship, ah but you have to keep your grades up to play on the school team....hmmm she was not interested in school and barely graduated...those were interesting battles as well...anyway too much emotional baggage to go into this right now...but bottom line, you want to go to school- then go. You don't want to go, then don't. You're a grown up- figure it out. I love my daughter, but honestly will be happy when she gets a little older and gets her spoiled head out of her ass. Sorry but this morning I only have truth in me.

So time to put on my own big girl panties, get dressed and go. Drew is almost ready and she always takes the longest ha ha. Well this was truly a dear diary day....

Mexico fun fact:
Only ten countries in the world have a larger population than Mexico’s 109,955,400 million people.

Remembering why I love living here...

Today I remember why I love it here. It was hot outside but the wind blew all day and that helps alot. I had to run an errand so went to Arrura Bodega (Mexico Walmart) and remembered I like the open air feeling of this town. People were happy all around me, everyone smiled, people said hola. A lady and a little girl were coming out of the store and the little girl lost her red balloon, but it came down pretty quick so I ran after it along with a store clerk- they guy who gets you a cart, helps direct you out of the lot, wants to unload your groceries from the cart into your car, I think the only money they make is the tips they get in the parking lot- anyway another shopper and her family saw me chasing it and grabbed it as it went by, and gave it to me. I gave it to the clerk and he ran it back to the little girl who's mom was putting her groceries away. Everybody laughed.

We went to the beach last nite right before it got dark- no zumba cause of my migraine, I was feeling crappy but better. I even had a couple of panic attacks the nite before when the migraine was settling in. I just know the panic attacks are about chemical imbalance...and yeah it could be a stress chemical, the migraine is surely the same thing. I am completely calm about my upcoming procedure- I know it's just going to be...oh the irregular cells from the benign polyp...hear that? BENIGN?? So see maybe I have subconscious stress- hey ha ha ha subconscious stress- probly a good defense for murder right? I'll have to remember that! But I digress. The beach was breezy, Sam ran all over the place chasing the ball- unfortunately until he started to limp poor baby. Lucky tried hard to keep up, but the beach is Sam's place.

Amazing flocks of birds went by; pelicans, sea gulls, and another bird kinda a cross between the two- a long thick beak but pretty short wings and body. Anyway they all sorta floated by, a little swooping, but mostly swaying;  sometimes the breeze held them still in one spot for more than a few seconds it seemed. Then the sky itself showed it's colors, light and dark blues, swirling pinks, grays, and they kept changing as the sun disappeared. The beach is so peaceful. A few people walked along, a couple of joggers, and when I walked up a small rise I could see people further down in a big group, splashing around, and others setting up some kind of camp.

I meant to take the dogs to the park today; I wanted to walk on the lawn, but the time got away from me. Packing, and I had to stop by my new friend Deb's to drop off a couple of copper scorpions Everardo made for a charity event she's hosting and needs some auction items- well when she and I get to talking, truthfully she could talk for 4 hours straight I think, only taking a breath in between subjects...but it was all fun stuff, lots of "town gossip" cause she's been here a long time and knows alot of nutty people, so I like to listen....anyway the day slipped by. But lately I've been thinking and talking about leaving Mexico, and this morning I woke up and thought- I love it here. I love teaching; it's fun and I just let the class form itself. I like the people out at the center. I don't believe in every single thing they do, but they have good intentions. I like the people here, it's a much slower paced environment. It's SO much cheaper to live. I like my own Spanish lessons I'm doing with Rosetta Stome and I'll do them next week in Calif, and in Sept I'm starting a new, more advanced class with 2 women who are at about my level, I think we all 3 excel in different areas so we will challenge each other. I'm very excited about that.

Even taking the dogs to the vet is super cheap here- biy what a money making racket it is in the states. This city has about 60K people here, probly more than is published, but pretty much the same as the town we come from in Ca. There's a guy that sells newspapers in an intersection by the bank who always waves to me; when I'm stopped on his side we always chat. I've never bought a paper from him, but one of these days I'll start buying it. But he's just the nicest man. There's another intersection where now the entertainment is a juggler on a really tall unicycle, at another a guy who juggles flaming sticks. People are so creative here. I feel hope in the air. Yeah I think I want to be here for awhile......

I'm leaving early in the morning tomorrow, the boys are all staying home taking care of each other. But I'll be back in a week, back to my little Mexican town. And bringing my girls with me, even if only for 3 days...
Viva

Fun fact about Mexico:
Mexico’s size is 756,066 square miles, which is almost three times larger than Texas

Migraines and lawyers....sounds right...

Had a migraine today. They take me down. I threw up. I can barely see. However down here, for about $10, I got a shot this afternoon (when I couldn't take it anymore) that starts working on it right away. Of course then I slept away the balance of the afternoon and had a 'cup-a-soup' (noodles) for dinner. I barely woke up before 7pm, so obviously didn't go to Zumba, and now I won't go for at least a week cause I'm leaving for California on Sunday morning.
We turned on the mini split last nite in the bedroom last nite- that's an air conditioner-and it's the only place we have one in the house. The problem is I don't like the ac shooting air down on me while I'm sleeping. I laid down and Everardo was out like a light- which is funny cause I always go to bed around midnite and he comes later, or in this heat, alot of the time he stays on the couch with the overhead fan- cause our queen size bed is too small when we are sweating, tossing and turning....but he was very happy about the ac in our room so he went to bed before midnite. I came in and it's on my side of the bed so I felt like it was blowing on me. I even tried putting the sheet over me for the first time in about 2 months...so I slept on the couch, and woke up with a migraine...aarrgghh.

Ok now different news. We went to see the lawyer this morning that our friend Mike gave us the name of. Looking for Everardo to be able to return to the United States legally. We decided that our best bet is to apply for a visitor's visa (6 months) and then when we're up there, we can go see an immigration lawyer about residency. I hope it will help that we're married. I think you have to be married for more than 2 years for it to be a helpful thing in our favor...and we have. This guy told us it was much better to be wanting to live in Calif than Arizona- that Arizona is really hard to deal with for visas or residency. I had a feeling that would be the case, which is why I told him we wanted to live in Calif.

So- he is going to help Everardo with the visa petition process; filling out the paperwork. Once you submit it, it takes up to 20 days to get an answer. 20 days- that's pretty good. Everardo got in some trouble when he was younger living in the states, so we gotta keep our fingers crossed. I think they'll be able to get it all done next week while I'm gone, but whatever it takes. We'd been waiting for that 2 year marriage mark and we hit it in July.

So I leave 7:30 am Sunday morning for the Phoenix airport. Haha my flight isn't until 5pm, but they were saying it takes 5 hours to get up to their office, then I take a cab to the airport, and I'd rather sit in the airport with a book for a couple of hours than anx't over getting there like last time. That was the other shuttle company and they are the ones who got a flat tire in the desert with no spare, left the border 2 hours late....yeah they told me I'd get a $5 discount next time- when I stopped laughing I said- you think I'm gonna ride with you again?? I'll be up there for a week and a day, and the girls are coming back with me, but until Friday...so I hope I remember tomorrow to stop by Portugal Insurance down at the corner to see if they have the one day insurance for me to drive in the states. Their return flight is a 1pm so there's no way they'd make it on the shuttle. I asked them to get a flight as late in the afternoon as possible, but apparently Halla didn't get Friday nite off, so will fly into San Francisco and be at work by 7pm. I find it kinda puzzling that she couldn't get a nite off when she asked 2 weeks in advance....don't know what's going on there....oh well maybe my friend Pam will be back by then and want to take a little road trip with me. It's about a 4 hour trip each way...so boring as hell coming back I guess. However I've never driven it so I'll have to pay attention on the way up in the shuttle van.

We took the dogs to the beach for a quick jaunt this evening, as the sun was going down and the sky was stripes of pink and blue. There were all these different flocks of birds, pelican, sea gulls, and another bird with a long thick round beak- but not like the pelicans. I tried to take some pictures, but only with my phone so they probly won't be too specific. Ha ha at one point a drop of moisture, I wish it had been rain hit my face...and I was not close enough to the water for it to have been the surf...so what was it? Bird pee? Bird spit? Ah well, I carry hand sanitizer in my purse (ever since I had cancer and had to worry about every germ while I was in treatment), so I kinda washed my face in it. I love to sit and just look at the ocean. Here there's not the amazing waves that we had in Guerrero cause we were on the open ocean, but it's still mesmerizing. It reminded me why I love it here. And I need reminding. I know it is no time for decision for us when I'm worried (and pretending not to be) about this up coming procedure and what the results could be. I miss my daughters, I miss cool green grass, I miss redwood trees, I miss living on a paved road. I miss the control I don't have by not being fluent, I miss my daughters. I miss big AA meetings; here out English speaking meeting is very small, and all the Spanish meetings are small as well. They usually have 10-15, which is much bigger than the English meetings that are 4 or 5, but that's how they do it here. There has to be 20 different groups here for the Spanish speakers; they like smaller groups. Maybe it's cause of how their format runs; you get to talk for 15 minutes and the meetings are an hour and a half. In the bigger English meetings (not here) you are asked to speak only for 3-5 minutes. I tried to talk my gal pal Pam into going up to Phoenix once a month for a bigger meeting but so far she has declined. Partly cause she has been going on her own road trips; to see family, to see friends, to escape the heat, and I'm not comfortable driving 4 hours each way alone for a meeting. Ok- did I say I miss my kids? Poppi told me the other day he misses his uncle, and I know he's worried about that old man. He was so happy when his cousin Anna and her hubby Carlos came to visit. He really loves his family. So he's ready to go back as well, but we both want to wait for about a year- sell the Playa Ventura house, go thru the next "season" for him working on the beach which starts in October...and just keep deciding not to decide....for now.

I've been looking at rents in northern Calif, Modesto is 2 hours from Everardo's family in one direction and 2 hours from mine in another direction, but it's hot there, and dusty, kinda like here. So I looked at Willits, which is almost 2 hours north of my kids, so almost 4 to Poppi's family, but he was good with that. In fact he wants me to look at Eugene Oregon...but he did like the idea of Willits. Now we believe that any move is 6 months to a year away, but if he gets a visitor visa, what will we do? I don't know. I do know that this is not the right time for decision making. And we still want to sell the Guerrero house before we leave as well. We did just get a long term renter, so that's something. And he's a Fed, just got transferred to the area. If we move back we can't afford to live in our house, we need the income, and will I have to get a job? I'm 6 years away from social security- I heard you can start to collect at 62...and then maybe we'd go back to the house. Right now we love out renters and they love the house. If they read this- don't worry, even if we came back in 2014, we won't ask you to move...ha ha can't afford it!

Sometimes Poppi talks about selling it and buying something smaller, but it is small, less than 1300 square feet, and I do love that house more than any other house I owned, and it's the smallest by far. The first one was 1600 sq ft, then 2050, then 3800, then back down to about 2400 I think, then this little house, across the street from a big park. Yeah I love that house. For some reason it always made me think of my Grandma G. She must have lived in a little house before she lived in the trailer, cause why else would it make me think of her. That house gives me serenity.

The hurry up and wait here, for everything is tiring. Driving is tiring because people treat the traffic rules as recommendations. And the damn water truck that drives slowly thru the neighborhood with his horn blasting by 8:30 every morning, he is tiring. The problem there is that our bedroom wall and window is right on the street. No yard or fence whatsoever. Our little yard is on the other side.

I love teaching, but that comes and goes as well. Now I'm having just 4 or 5 people, and 1 will be someone who's been coming and the rest new. So I'm back to just teaching the same stuff over and over. I miss all my students that were learning ordering in a restaurant or at the drive thru McDonalds. Maybe this new group will get there. The directors tho' are saying they want to charge people to come to my class- that if they pay they will be more consistent. But I say- hey these are people who need to come here to eat- how much money do you think they have? Everardo then said- then teach them here at out house for free. That I can use the exercise room. But the problem there is, how would they get here? Most of them walk to the center...and I have a feeling I'd have the same issues with inconsistency. And again, as I said- this is no time for me to be making decisions, about anything. They would be out of fear- no matter how much I might deny it. So this writing tonite is merely venting...oh wait - isn't that what it always is???

So I'm feeling much better. My next post will probly be from northern Calif. I am head over heels in love with my husband, and we will do whatever the next right thing, for us, is. Our 2 doggys are crashed out, Lucky puppy is about to hit 9 weeks and is still sooo tiny. Sam turned 6 on 4th of July and is panting in front of the fan.And we just started watching a Batman movie, so it's allll gooood!

Mexico fun fact:
The Chihuahua is the world’s smallest dog and is named for a Mexican state.

Zumba, business in Mexico and other things..

Zumba continues to kick my ass. Tonite however I was on fire and actually a little bit surprised when she started the cool down. Now last nite, it was painful- but entirely my fault. I ate a cheeseburger and fries only about an hour before class. I barely made it thru class...modified everything, and threw up when I got home. Sipped ice water for about an hour, then had some peanut butter bread. No hamburgers for me for a while. This place though- Star Burger- has cheeseburgers and french fries so good that when I go to the US for a visit, it's not something I miss. I know I wrote about it before; but we go there about once a month. Yesterday Everardo worked with Rick- Deb's husband and he called late afternoon & asked me to grab some burgers- and I did it, was really hungry and wolfed down my burger...ooops.

Deb and Rick are a couple about 10 years older than us. We met them because they are involved with the community center where I teach English & Everardo was working with the dogs. They have a house a couple of blocks from us; she lives here 3 weeks a month and he is trying to wrap up their business in Tuscon so they can be here permanently. He asked Everardo to help him the last few days with some construction stuff, installing air conditioners and insulation....I think maybe to sort of evaluate him as a worker, cause we have expressed interest in whatever business they start down here. They are interesting and she's a kick in the butt funny- always has a funny story and she can literally go on for hours! She's a mover & a shaker, and she's decided to network down here and get to know people starting businesses, to get to know women who are involved in things. Hmmm maybe a good person for me to hang with.

What I also like is they get the -don't need to reinvent the wheel concept. Let's see what other people are doing. Like getting medical insurance down here...seguro popular...getting permanent residency. They reach out and touch people and she's inviting me to be a sidekick. Sounds ok for now.

She knows how to get people to donate...money...food...stuff....she's good for the center. Things work out here, but differently than in the states. Everything takes time. But much like the states, it's who you know. I heard a guy talking about not wanting to give money (bribe) and "do things the right way". and I said, but that is the right way here. And the truth is, in the states...you make political contributions...isn't that the same thing? So this woman knows people, and the ones she doesn't know? She figuring out how to get to know them. This will be priceless when they start a business. It's like there are a select few who get things done, who influence things here.

However I have changed. I don't want to be involved. I just wanna watch ha ha. I used to always like to be involved in the drama. But no more. I see it around the center..well hear it actually, and I am trying to just show up and do my teaching thing and get out. I don't want to be involved with the dog ministry. It's evolving, growing, but I also see a lot of toes being stepped on, and seeing some resentments growing. Partly because my husband is Mexican he was talking with people at the different sites that are involved and so would hear things the people in charge are not hearing..

It's a fine line...yes the dogs need attention, it's a huge huge problem here and in all of Mexico. But there are also people who have nothing to eat, and they need attention, they need help, too. It's complicated. But it's not my fight. Know what I mean? I want to help people and the way I have chosen is to teach English to adults who want to learn. I do it for free; these are people who have no jobs and no food.

Well that's not completely true. A couple of people have jobs, and want to learn English to do better at their jobs, to be able to talk to more people here since there's alot of English speakers here. Francisco is a water truck driver and wants to talk to clients. He is very motivated and tries very hard. Another lady is a seamstress and wants more clients.. but mostly people are hoping to find a job, and being bilingual is a big plus.

So- a week from today I'll have had my procedure, and by evening be recuperating. The paperwork says about recovery that I can resume normal daily activities after one day, if I'm not bleeding, hmmm well last time I bled for a week, but it was a different procedure, just in the same area. I have decided that nothing is wrong, or at most, that these irregular cells are merely the origin of the polyp I had removed in May...it had to come from somewhere right? I will be gone for a week, and so miss a week of zumba- oh see how I circled back up to what I was talking about in the beginning of this post? ha ha I am soooo clever I kill me sometimes ha ha. ok anyway (de todos modos), how much of my momentum will I lose not exercising for a week? I've been doing it regular for more than a month now, so hopefully it won't take too much to build my air back up. I am changing from it...ever so slowly, but I am. I think I'm also making better food choices since I'm exercising so hard, why wreck it with candy....however I'd love some sugar right now...some cookies? Or piguinos? (those are chocolate cupcakes with chocolate frosting and the white swirly line across them...in the U.S. they are Hostess cupcakes. wow- how pathetic am I?

I want to get a couple of pictures of the zumba class and post them on facebook (since I still haven't figured out how to post here). Since it's been consistent the class just keeps growing, 22 or 23 I think tonite. The funny thing was at the back was an ice cream vendor with his cart...waiting for us to finish and buy ice cream??

See I have no time for cancer or any other health problems. I have zumba, I am learning Spanish and teaching English. I am going to start "networking" with Deb to see if there's any other interesting people I'd like to know, any activities I'd like to get involved with...oh and soooo many books to read. We are casually talking about a trip to Ensenada to see if we like it. I am being careful to try to "appear causal" about it..ha ha...because Everardo says once I get something in my head I never let it go. hmmm Maybe that's true, but I will be sneakier about it ha ha. I realize he has lived all over the place, the longest as an adult (well starting at about 16) was 18 years in Gilroy, but then he has floated, Oregon, California, Mexico...and knowing he's lived in Ensenada and knows some people there has me excited. And it's ok to change my mind again. I'm dying to see (ooops see how now I'm dying to know, dying to see), anyway to see if Ensenada is more like northern Calif in vegetation...trees, grass, and NO desert. It is not the desert for sure and I like that. It's probably more like southern Calif than northern...but I heard from someone today that it's beautiful.

But do the have free zumba in the park? Spanish lessons for 50 pesos for an hour and a half? That starts in Sept, and of course I have Rosetta Stone installed on my laptop so I can continue with that. Ah vamos a ver. Just gotta get past next week, right? At first I thought oh- only deep in Mexico is the real Mexico. I'm so silly- Mexico is Mexico. Guererro is definitely deep in Mexico, and Puerto Penasco is very close to the northern border with Arizona...both are Mexico. And you can live in Mexico as Mexico or you can live here as an American- which people do here and I don't know why- well yes I do- cause it's cheaper than the U.S. And of course I felt the same about Baja...is it Mexico...uh yeah it is. Anyway like I said...vamos a ver.

Also my daughters came up with the idea of coming back with me after my week. But I know it's because they're scared I'm sick. I would love for them to come but....well the tickets are more cause it's inside the 2 week window, but more important, they both start school the 19th of Aug, I return here on the 12th. So if they came with me the 12th- Monday, then they need to go back on Friday cause school starts Monday. So that basically 3 days with us. I mean they could go back Saturday I guess, but then they better be totally prepared for school, right? So I wrote to my Drewy and told her that she can come in 3 months- her school is a medical assistant certificate program that finishes in Oct, then she has to do intern hours before becoming certified...but she could come then and stay longer. For a trip south to Michocan and Guerrero. Of course I want them to come, now, then, whenever they can...but I don't want them to come under pressure. So she said they're going to decide tonite. ok there's another thing about Ensenada- easier for them to come.

Fun fact:
Mexico’s flag is made up three vertical stripes. The left green stripe stand for hope, the middle white stripe represents purity, and the right red stripe represents the blood of the Mexican people. The picture of an eagle eating a snake is based on an Aztec legend