What a beautiful day in Mexico! Started out talking to my little sister and that was nice. She was sick but on the mend. I miss her, and we talked a little bit about Mom and how fast a year goes by. Last year this time was tough. I followed that with a call with my younger daughter. That was so nice cause it's hard to catch her; 19, working and school, and busy with friends. Hopefully I'll finish the day talking to my other daughter, but I did get to chat with her on the phone last nite for about an hour, so...

Finished a book & started another. When the tide was low, close to 3pm, took Sam down to the beach. We haven't played in the water in weeks; too dangerous this time of year. But today was fun, refreshing, relaxing. Sam loved it. Poppi brought this board, not a surfboard, much shorter and made of something like really thick styrofoam, with a lead to connect to your wrist. Well the water is still too strong for that. But we played in the little holes in front of the rocks, letting the water slide in and around, sometimes pulling us one way or the other. Then Monsie & Ronoldo showed up (7&8yrs) and jumped in with us. We all floated around, they asked about English class- when was it, and I laughed and said never if no students show up (in Spanish of course). But I said we are having class right now and they rattled off the months and week days, and asked for the words for waves, rocks, fish, etc.

Sam was so happy and now he's exhausted- me too ha ha. We stayed awhile after they went home and finally came back up. While I was in the shower my sweet hubby opened coconuts for the delicious water inside, then we ate and have since collapsed. No walk today; I'm too lazy.

So the day really started with Everardo going to find the electrician guy and having him come and tweak something on the pole across the street. 200 pesos. I think we'll have to put this guy on our payroll, we paid him 200 pesos 3 or 4 times now...after having no electricity for 2 days we got it back. But all day yesterday it- well I guess the word is surged- the lights dim & bright, the fan slow and fast, the tv was impossible cause the electric wouldn't be enough for the cable so it would go off, say pls wait...then come back onto the menu. Then you have to first lower the volume (cause at menu for some reason it's on full blast), then choose a block (movies, news, etc), then pick the channel you were watching. A few times a nite is one thing, but constantly, every 5 or 10 minutes is ridiculous. So we gave up on tv yesterday but we like to watch it at nite cause we stay up pretty late since it's so hot. Anyway whatever he did seems to have done the trick.

Breakfast was nice, we had tamales made by the neighbor across the street, who also gave us fresh picked corn that we ate tonite. Everardo says since he helped at the cemetery the other day more people are talking to him when he walks by. Ha ha I already thought he was friends with everyone! But I had never talked to the people across the street; it's kinda more than across the street- their house is set way back and there's no driveway or anything. They're not home much cause they have a restaurant and beach area at Casa de Piedras, the place we walk to in the evenings, it's about a 20 min walk to get there I think- I'll have to time it. Then on the way last nite on our walk another guy started talking to us; they have a little hotel/restaurant along that road and he was taking chicken (I think) out of a big pizza oven. Poppi said we wanted to build one and the guy said get the materials and then call me- I'll help you with it! I didn't know him either, but he was there that day, too.

Interesting note about that sad day when the baby died. I heard people saying there were signs that the baby wasn't well and I tried to ask what signs, since I also heard that the baby dr was a bad dr- that several babies had died under her care. (Over what time period I don't know or even know what's true and what's not.) But I didn't understand what I was hearing about the signs. I thought the baby must have been in distress, or it was a hard birth, or something. But the signs were superstitious signs, and people believe in this. 2 different people had dreams that somehow signified death; one was about the mother wearing white by the edge of the sea and whiteness all around her. The otther dream I didn't understand what they were saying. Another sign was that the mother brought home some flowers one day (before the birth), and 4 or 5 different people told her they were the color of funeral flowers.

So I don't know why the poor little guy passed on, but it was truly a sad day. It's nice that people are also pretty religious around here because hopefully it was some comfort to those young parents.

My husband also has some beliefs- isn't it funny how when we don't believe it we call them superstitions? When he sees a flock of birds flying in huge circles (not vultures), he says it's gonna be windy later. He also wraps a spider web around a cut for a band-aid.

He also told me of a belief that if you spill fresh milk from a cow after boiling it, the cows teats will split. This one he told me because he bought some fresh milk from a kid the other day. It's cheaper than milk from the store, and more available. So of course I had to google it to see if it's ok to just drink it like that- and of course- there's a huge debate about it. It seems like it should be ok, good for you even; although I'll have to drink it a little bit at a time to get my body used to it. Well he boiled the first amount anyway and so that's safe for sure. Tastes very rich, but the boiling of course kills off the good stuff as well as the bad stuff. To be honest I emailed my cancer doctor to ask since it's full of hormones and I'm taking medicine to block estrogen...not sure if that makes sense but I was also surprised that I couldn't eat soy anymore either. Of course he hasn't answered yet...You know, I want to eat organically, I want to eat what's fresh and available as the people who live here do- cause Ilive here, too. But the truth is that F'ing cancer scared me, so I try to be careful.

 As I told my sister on the phone today I am a cross between Terry Little House on the Prairie and Terry of Maybery (ya know- Aunt Bea).

Long week this week. Sometimes it's just hard to not speak the language. I know I have to give myself a break, it takes time, but some days I let it get me down. Add to that no electricity since yesterday morning. Last nite we finally took everything out of the freezer and took it down to Chela & Gumes's to put in their freezer. The electricity was only out at our end of town. When I woke up yesterday it was off, then back on for about an hour between 10-11am, then off again until about 6pm today.

It was kinda like when we first got here, it was a couple of weeks before we got telephone & internet, so I'd take my laptop down to Chela's and sit on their restaurant patio and go online. Late this morning I did the same thing. I also brought my book so I spent a little time in her hammock, too. ha ha. Then she got some customers, several women and some small kids. Chela was by herself cause Gume is building a rock wall down by their house (Everardo is helping), and the kids weren't home. One thing I definitely am not is a cook- so I would be no help, but I asked her if she needed e. She said yes, get them cerveza when they ask for it....but they were not big drinkers. She had to send one of the little neighbor kids, Oscar, to buy something & asked me to watch the baby- 1 yr old. I said sure since she was palying in the sand with Tony (who I call Tigre). But of course Tigre decided to run off and the baby wobbly walked way behind so I took her. She sat with me for awhile but then wiggled to get down. I thought I had made progress because last time Oscar habnded her to me she screamed bloody murder. So I put her down but stayed close to her. Ok for about 5 minutes, then I saw the face getting ready to shriek. I took her inside where Chela was cooking & was ok for about half a minute, then got down, walked off, started screaming. I pick her up- uh oh bloody murder screams. Poor Chela, trying to cook and this baby,,,,so she ran her across the way to her momma.

Anyway Polo showed up a few minutes later so I was not needed. Since she was busy me and Sam walked back down the beach. When Everardo came home he said Chela told him I wanted to help, but because of language, she couldn't tell me - it was easier for her to just do it, or have the kids help.

Today I am feeling much better, but last couple of days I couldn't keep the frustration & sadness out. I do love living here, this is where I want to be. And I know it takes time. I can speak enough Spanish to manage. To shop, to order food, choose fish or veggies in the market place. I can drive and buy ice cream. And one on one I can have a conversation, sometimes it's comical, sometimes fine, sometimes frustrating. Today Chela gave me 100 pesos; I asked why and she said for water (this was all in Spanish). For 4 jugs. I said did Everardo give her the money? No her money. Then why give me the money? She said it was for 4 jugs of water from the white truk, not the Pepsi truck we usually buy it from. We both laughed cause I still didn't know why she gave me the money. I ask her all the questions again and she answered. So I said- I understand all the words but still not why she gave me the money. I kept it and she said when Everardo returned he'd tell me. He had gone home to call the electric company (again). So- when he came he had already seen her by their house, he told me she wanted me to buy the water when the guy came! So! She did say it was from the white truck, but I also thought she told me it was in her kitchen, but she was pointing to where it goes. So one on ne doesn't always work either.

And in a group? Forget about it! At first I usually know what we're talking about but then it gets fast and I get lost. Ha ha by the time I think of how to say something to add, the topic has changed at least 5 times! It's very isolating. I'm used to talking alot, laughing alot, being very social. Poppi is like that, he makes friends with every one, chats everyone up- it's one of the things I love about him, because it's like me! But that's what is frustrating for me, not being a part of. Chela and Gume both say I have learned so much Spanish, and I talk to them so much better than when I got here, and it's true, but one of my character defects is I'm an instant gratification girl and want it all now! Like I said I'm better now but I sucked last couple of days.

I was so mad that I heard Poppi & Gume talking about the demonstration that blocked us from going to Ometepec, and even though I had the flier, all I knew was it was about the electrical bills- that they are too high. And I could see a couple of words, like corruption...But I can't expect him to spend all of his time translating for me, or knowing which things I really want to know every detail about. I struggle because once I start getting mad I think I want to know everything so I form my own opinions...on everything. I know that I'm being petty. He tries so hard, and most of the time it's all good. Actually everyone tries. So maybe enough feeling sorry for myself- it seems that way once I'm over it.

So school is over, too. The kids don't show up, not since a week ago Monday. Hmm that was the day I got mad at some of them ha ha. I also divided them into 2 groups, since a few were brand new and the others needed to move on. I also sent 2 kids home who were not interested in learning anything. But maybe the biggest thing was I said no more dulces (candy). ha ha I only meant it for that block of time.  No candy- no kids. It's ok- they didn't really want to learn, it was their parents, and now shool has started. And actually it's a relief, I was spending time worrying about what to show them next. I'm not a teacher, and so was looking for ideas. Everardo also said, good now you can stop worrying about it- at first I loved it but started to anx't- ha ha that's me- worry when I can't do something perfect- even when I have no control over it. Yep that's what my sponsor said too. I said but I want ot do something to be of service, I thought this was a good idea. She said maybe my destiny is t help women alcoholics, I know how to do that. I have shared, in Spanish, at meetings. Just another reason to work on my fluency!

Ha ha full circle. Back to needing to get the language down, but now I can use this time I was using for class to work on Spanish. Polo said he'd help me (13yrs- Chela's son speaks English) I'm also gonna try translating some things like the local newspaper. In a couple of days we will have lived here 3 months. I bet in 6 months I'll be even better.

I was SO completely WRONG! About how it is here when a an infant dies. It's a huge deal. A very big thing. The whole day today was about that precious baby. Those gunshot noises I thought I was hearing- they were the firecrackers that are let off all day when a baby dies. And it's only for babies or young children, not adults. I'm not sure whether it's because they are angels or it's telling the angels they are coming. And they are super loud; I thought they were going off right outside our property. Ha ha I was home alone, not even Sam was here and at first didn't want to go look. The kids never showed up for school, and suddenly it was 3pm.

Then Everardo came home and said, get ready, we're going to go with all of them to the cemetery. So we went down the road to the family's house. There were alot of people sitting on their patio. The other was Gume's half sister, which is why Everardo left with him this morning. Turns out they went to the cemetery and dug the baby's grave. So we went and sat; there was a guy, I guess a priest although he wasn't dressed in any special way, and he was reading and then singing a prayer (I think a prayer), then the people would sing the prayer too. I think it was a mass.They had made a little altar, and decorated it with rolls of crate paper and paper flowers. The baby was in this tiny white satin box. At the end Eriika told me I should view the baby and make the sign of the cross, so I did that. Of course that pushed me over the edge, that tiny perfect baby. So small so quiet. And I started thinking of my sister and when her baby boy died the day after he was born. I think she almost died from it. The pain I mean. Your baby. And like my sister, this was this woman's first baby. I met her a few weeks ago while she was still pregnant. I remember saying this little girl is pregnant, but Everardo said well she's 20. (To me, 20 is still too young to have a baby, but I am in a new country where people think differently, and no matter what, nobody deserves this).

So after the mass, they picked up the little that the tiny box was on and walked up the road to the church where somebody rang the big bell outside the church several times. My husband helped to carry it; along the way each of the 4 men carrying the table were relieved by another man.After the church bell stopped ringing the whole thing was lifted into the back of a truck. People got in all around it, and got into other trucks that had materialized (ha ha when I wasn't looking). We walked back the way we came, following the slow moving trucks, and picked up ours. Good thing cause one truck suddenly got a flat and so about 20 kids jumped in the back of our little Nissan. So we followed the caravan and turned up a dirt road in worse shape than the main road, and went up and up this beat up rocky road to the local cemetery. It was pretty. Not really maintained, except maybe by people just for their loved one's grave site. Not quite there and we all stopped and walked behind the men carrying the table with the tiny casket, like when we walked to the church. We followed them up and around to the grave site.

The box was open again. The priest prayed and sang, the people sang, it sounded like the same prayer over and over. Finally they closed the tiny box. But when they put nails in it, I cried. All the flowers from the house were there, too. My Poppi and another guy shoveled the dirt back into the hole with the box in it. Then they signaled these other guys who brought buckets of cement. Gune had laid a piece of crossed rebarb o top of the dirt and the they out wood planks around it to hold the cement. The cement was poured in, about 6 plastic buckets full, tall buckets. Gume spread it and smoothed it, then a couple of women placed all the flowers around it all. Then candles were lit. A cross had been made and it was pushed into the cement, and a wreath of beautiful blue flowers placed on it.

And then it was done. We piled back into the trucks and went back to their house. Before we had started the first procession to the church I was able to offer my condolences to the grandparents, and Everardo was able to speak with the father. Their family thanked us for coming. Afterwards we sat with Chela and Gume for a few minutes, Poppi and Gume cut open some coconuts for us to drink, and then we came home. The people here are beautiful, they come out for each other. They take care of each other. It was incredibly sad & incredibly beautiful at the same time. What a day.

The internet is up, but I can't get  to the “new post” portion of my blog, so I'll start offline. I didn't post since Saturday morning so thought I'd catch up. On Sat morning I shit down my laptop and we left for Ometepec. Things went downhill from there. I guess cause it was Sat, there was a lot of traffic going both ways. Highway 200 which is our connection to everywhere, is one lane each way. I know I've said before that everything here is so laid back, people take their time with everything from going to work, the doctor, to doctor visits, coming over for dinner, everything EXCEPT driving. This seems to be where everyone gets out their stress, their anx't. Everyone drives 100+ miles per hour, they tailgate like crazy, and pass whenever possible (or not possible), even to just get ahead one car. They pass on hills, corners, on the topes (speed bumps).

And Saturday just seemed over the top. And Everardo joined in. There were so many cars stuck behind this one old loaded down truck and we were almost at the end. Then a huge bus came behind us. And by huge I mean HUGE. The buses here are so big! Really tall, really long and really really wide...Anyway it got up so close behind us that I was worried. I mean if anybody tapped their brakes everybody would be in an accident. So people kept crawling up that poor truck's rear end. We started doing it too. On a hill. I was so scared I almost threw up. Kinda wrecked my day, ya know? The fact is I dthe rocks. Our silly dog climbed up too!

One funny thing I saw on our drive was something that for some reason reminded me of Pirates of the Carribean...but I think it was a dog there....I saw these 3 guys; one was standing in the back of a truck with a long rope tied to a donkey outside the truck. The donkey was straining back. One of the 2 guys outside by the donkey was trying to pull him and the other guy just watching. There was no ramp into the truck- did they think he was gonna jump up into the truck? As we passed it was like in slow motion, barley any movement except the donkey with a slight tug with his long neck. If I hadn't been mad I would have asked Poppi to stop for a picture, but...I didn't.

The other thing was on the way to Marquelia, there's this spot where these pieces of a kid's carnival are, a kid size ferris wheel, some little battered up cars. But there's also this ride that is like a big U,looks like a boat you know? And it rocks from side to side, getting higher each time? Well there was these little kids insi19in;"> So we turned around and came back. Kind of a crappy day, Rainy, gray, and when my fear wore off I was just tired, and angry. I read in the hammock, napped a little. Later Poppi and I and Sam took a long walk up the road to Casa de Piedras and climbed on the rocks. Our silly dog climbed up too!

One funny thing I saw on our drive was something that for some reason reminded me of Pirates of the Carribean...but I think it was a dog there....I saw these 3 guys; one was standing in the back of a truck with a long rope tied to a donkey outside the truck. The donkey was straining back. One of the 2 guys outside by the donkey was trying to pull him and the other guy just watching. There was no ramp into the truck- did they think he was gonna jump up into the truck? As we passed it was like in slow motion, barley any movement except the donkey with a slight tug with his long neck. If I hadn't been mad I would have asked Poppi to stop for a picture, but...I didn't.

The other thing was on the way to Marquelia, there's this spot where these pieces of a kid's carnival are, a kid size ferris wheel, some little battered up cars. But there's also this ride that is like a big U,looks like a boat you know? And it rocks from side to side, getting higher each time? Well there was these little kids inside and some bigger kids around the ride pushing it. The little ones were laughing and having a fun ride! I guess that stuff has been sitting there more than a month and I never seen anyone operating any of the rides, so they did it themselves ha ha! Pretty as a litually. I remember when my olderverything we needed at Walmart and didn't need to go anywhere else ha ha. But in the end we got ice cream from McDonald's and that made all of us happy...I was looking for those big storage bags, heavy plastic with a zipper to store all my clothes that are upstairs, well we found something similar- no zipper but you suck the air out with a vacuum...so I'm gonna give them a try. There were other little things we needed, like printer ink, blah blah blah and we got most of it. I did not like the sheets and the paint can wait until ext time when he picks me up from the airport after Houston.

But when we got back!! Chela had a surprise dinner for us...LOBSTER!! YUM it was so so so so good! Polo gave me one of the mini snickers he bought and then Everardo gave me a little back rub- I would have to say a perfect ending to the day.

This morning I got up and exercised. When I finished I saw a bowl of cereal on the table so ha ha Poppi came in while I was singing at the top of my lugs while dancing on uple of places to hang on, but we took it off as the road gets higher in front of our house because coming down thru the gate- it has a decorative roof, looks like the house roof, and we're afraid it will hit it. But now he3yr old. He was very happy to come and was a little disappointed that we found everything we needed at Walmart and didn't need to go anywhere else ha ha. But in the end we got ice cream from McDonald's and that made all of us happy...I was looking for those big storage bags, heavy plastic with a zipper to store all my clothes that are upstairs, well we found something similar- no zipper but you suck the air out with a vacuum...so I'm gonna give them a try. There were other little things we needed, like printer ink, blah blah blah and we got most of it. I did not like the sheets and the paint can wait until ext time when he picks me up from the airport after Houston.

But when we got back!! Chela had a surprise dinner for us...LOBSTER!! YUM it was so so so so good! Polo gave me one of the mini snickers he bought and then Everardo gave me a little back rub- I would have to say a perfect ending to the day.

This morning I got up and exercised. When I finished I saw a bowl of cereal on the table so ha ha Poppi came in while I was singing at the top of my lugs while dancing on the ellm some money anyway. Interesting eh?

So we went to Acapulco yesterday, kind of to take a drive and shake off the bad air from Saturday’s drive. We took Polo, Chela's 13yr old. He was very happy to come and was a little disappointed that we found everything we needed at Walmart and didn't need to go anywhere else ha ha. But in the end we got ice cream from McDonald's and that made all of us happy...I was looking for those big storage bags, heavy plastic with a zipper to store all my clothes that are upstairs, well we found something similar- no zipper but you suck the air out with a vacuum...so I'm gonna give them a try. There were other little things we needed, like printer ink, blah blah blah and we got most of it. I did not like the sheets and the paint can wait until ext time when he picks me up from the airport after Houston.

But when we got back!! Chela had a surprise dinner for us...LOBSTER!! YUM it was so so so so good! Polo gave me one of the mini snickers he bought and then Everardo gave me a little back rub- I would have to say a perfect ending to the day.

This morning I got up and exercised. When I finished I saw a bowl of cereal on the table so ha ha Poppi came in while I was singing at the top of my lugs while dancing on the elliptical. Probably not a pretty site since I sing terribly and sweat like a horse when I'm exercising! I play 70's rock & roll and go for it.

Anyway after I was in the kitchen and he came in from being at Gune & Chela's. A sad thing: Gume's half sister, or maybe sister in law, not sure, just had a baby and it died right after going to the doctor. The weird thing was they were not too upset, I said Oh God I'm so sorry and he was like, no no it's ok and he and Gume were on their way to see the husband, and the baby was in a basket at Gume's father's place which is next door to them. I guess I don't know how big of a thing it is. But Poppi said, these things happen, it's ok. I know everybody seems to have a lot of kids here, and they also seem to have them young, but no matter what, isn't it a big thing? To the mother it must be a big big big thing, right? When I think of my sister I still get a lump in my throat. I think it almost killed her, and affected me over and over again thru the years. But this may be one of those things I won't be able to ask anyone about for now. When my Spanish is better, I mean way way way better, maybe I can talk to Chela about it. I don't know, we'll see....

We had a stormy weekend but this morning the sea is like glass again and the sky is so blue. And now, after a nice quiet morning, a huge truck is out there, so tall I can see some big long arm on top. Ha ha that probly means the electricity or the phone will go out soon, since all the wires hang low around here! It's funny, ours- our telephone cable and the electricity wire- due to all the construction trucks- the guys got these long long sticks- branches I guess, and one they connected to the top of our fence and one to the top of our gate and hooked the wires over the top to make them higher. I thought- hey pretty smart, and then I saw it other places, in other towns, along the roads.

Ok so there are also sounds like shots outside, which have been going on for about a half hour, every little while. I looked once and saw the guy working next door where they're gonna build their house so knew it couldn't be anything, and came back in. Now that there's trucks ha ha I'm not scared to go look. After all this is a dirt road in a tiny town, I bet they’re breaking up big rocks again. Think I'll put on my big girl panties and go look....