MY DAUGHTER IS GETTING MARRIED!!! I am so happy, so excited, so encouraged, so pleased, so comforted, I know he's the right guy for her. It's funny- Everardo said that Rex is good for her, that he is calm, he's solid, and her? Well she's just like me! Ha ha Wacky, sometimes insecure, strong and confident, fights for the underdog, never backs down, ok crazy, and a strong, grounded, calm man is a good partner for her. A safe place to land. Someone to listen and let you get it all out, and then give you a hug. I know what I'm talking about, especially of she is me. I am also married to that man. He's wonderful, my safe place. And it's very cool that he's also in recovery, cause he understands....everything. Boy I hope she's not as whacked out in her pea brain as me... I was an insecure disaster area for sooo many years. No she's a smart cookie that girl. And she found herself a good man. I like him so much. I have been hoping for quite some time that they would follow this path. Sounds like the wedding will be in about a year. Her and her little sister can have fun planning the wedding, and I know I'll be included in some of it, even if it's just to hear how it's going, what's she's thinking of, who and where, oh boy oh boy, my baby's getting married. I am just so pleased.

Well we finished the painting today. And I sent an email to the landlord telling her how much we spent on the paint and the brushes & rollers, and included some photos- it looks fantastic by the way. I know I know I gotta figure out how to add photos on this site, I always think of it when I'm writing and promptly forget when I finish...Usually she writes back to me pretty quick, but maybe the expense of the paint, added to the expense she asked me to carry over from Jan, maybe it gave her pause, in my opinion, better to rip the band aid off, I should just pay almost nothing for Feb, then it wouldn't look so bad to her...ah well. So the house looks amazing- did I say that already? It feels like we live here, like it's our home. It feels warm and comfy...and the colors are wild, bright, alive. Green, red, melon, purple- it's perfect.

Now if would just warm up around here! It's cold and it's killing some of my joints. I cannot make a tight fist, all my knuckles hurt. And on my right hand, my middle finger, when I'm sleeping it gets stuck in the curled up position.It makes this "thunk" when it opens, I have to move it with my other hand, or else Poppi massages my hand until it opens. It's from the pills I take as anti cancer medication. I have to take it until Nov of 2014. Well my joints only hurt in the cold, and hopefully it will get warmer soon. My joints never hurt in Playa Ventura, well my knees a little when it was raining non stop. So I'll say that was a good thing about being down there. I keep looking at the 10 day forecast here. But one thing for sure- it's a much colder, rainier winter than they ever have around here. It's not supposed to rain around here during the winter, it's supposed to rain in summer. In fact it's only supposed to rain less than 2 inches a year here- well I'm here to tell ya it's already rained 2 inches.

Teaching English out at the center is great- I'm actually teaching adults. They want to learn, I'm even getting the same people more than once in a row. It's so freaking cool! Doing sentences, making phrases, the excitement on their faces, and when they don't understand, I am actually able to find a way to explain it so they can understand. I'm totally making it up as I go, but it's working! I am so so so grateful to be able to do this. Thank you God. It really feels like I'm helping. I almost want to erase all of this part cause if I talk about it, does it lose it's goodness? I am just so amazed, and it's so cool during this class, it's just been a couple, but they like it, and...they STUDY at home! I actually emailed my brother cause I couldn't figure out how to explain "do" and "does", like 'what does she need to take on her vacation'- in Spanish when you ask what she needs, you just says que necesita? Like what you need. Well I haven't heard from him yet, but I googled and googled and I think I might know what to say, partly know and partly, well it just is- ha ha. One guy, Ruben, he actually knows a little English, which is much more than the other 3, and he asked me what's the significance of "does", so I gotta come up with something. He is very jolly, asks alot of questions, and also tries to help the others, so he is very good for the class and for me. I felt like I was walking on a cloud yesterday when I left there.

Oh yeah, yesterday was Valentine's Day, and Poppi brought me roses out to the center. I made me a cut out heart with a silly poem for him. Then I had a great day out there, then later we went down to the malecon where they had a local radio station and live music, giving couple certificates for dinner at local restaurants, then the music started and a little dancing, but it was cold so we went home before it really started getting going. Then I got the call from my Drewy, my baby's gettin' married. Hell of a day eh? Tomorrow is the international iron chef competition down at the Shrimp Park, so that should be fun. Life is beautiful.

Guess I wasn't done. Ok I couldn't take a nap cause I had a cup of coffee while writing the first post this afternoon, and couldn't read cause I'm too tired. Ha. But been thinking (uh oh) more about the whole cheaper medicine thing, and no politics this time, but I realized I said well I could always live in Yuma and cross for my meds. DUH WHAT? The only reason we'd move back to the states would be, to be closer to our kids, so Yuma?? I think not! Mexico or San Francisco- that's it. I think I'd be happy to stay here, but again my girls, and now his girl, too. Maybe the kids would move here....

So tomorrow nite I'm going to this dinner for a group called "Uncommon Women on Common Ground". All I kow about them is what I saw on their FB page, something about women in this community getting together to talk about what they are doing and/or ideas about things that could get started in this community...something like that..They meet once a month with a dinner, and it's hosted by someone or some group. It's only 2 hours long, which seems kinda short to me, especially if at least one hour is dinner since you will be just talking to table mates...hmmm I don't know ha ha maybe 2 hours is a good thing. I'm interested to see what people around here are into, and I like that it's a women only thing...well ok what I like is the name- and I hope it lives up to the name. If I like it, there will be one more thing to be a part of around here, and I'm kinda liking it around here.

I am really looking forward to taking Spanish classes! I feel like I'm on the edge of understanding so much! So I guess I know alot of words, but that's so different from conversations. Today I read this highway sign that said "Mantenga limpiar la carratera" (Keep the highway clean), so I wanted to know if the word keep was used the same for...keep your hands to yourself, keep your money, keep your eyes peeled, keep the book in the desk....well your husband can't be your teacher. At first when I tried to say all that in Spanish he said yes, you can use it all those ways. Then said...well- it's a different word for keep your money, oh and a different word for keep your hands....- so is it all those things or only good for a messy highway? Arrgghh Spanish is hard...yeah I know I need an open mind, like sometimes keep is about maintenance, sometimes it's about holding something, or about ...hell I don't know. It's kinda like I tried to teach this thing to this teenager Jessica; that sometimes Spanish has 2 words where we have 1 (like "la" and "el" English has "the) and sometimes Spanish has 1 word and English has 2 words (like "porque" in Spanish is both "why" and "because" in English). And then there is slang- "que onda"? is what's happening? like "que pasa", but it's slang.

You know living here makes me really consider so much around me. I think the biggest lesson has been patience, and I think I'm actually developing some. Not rushing is a nice concept, and of course acceptance ties right in with patience. Then acceptance around the poverty I see, and I know it's not just Mexico of course, but it's where I am right now. And how different people deal with their lives; accepting their lot, trying to improve, angry and taking whatever they can get- actually I think it's the way people act in all walks of life, all the time, just for some reason - I guess because so much is new to me, including the language, I'm seeing it. I almost said- seeing it so clearly, but I don't mean clearly like I understand, just seeing symptoms clearly. The 3 boys I had last Thursday for English, I was trying to do sentences; they are about 8 or 9, and I asked where they wanted to go on a trip. One said New York, one said Las Vegas, and one said United States, but when I asked why they all wanted to go to the US, one changed his answer to Chiappas. I asked if he'd been there before and he said no. So The kid from NY said he wanted to go there because it is so beautiful, and big. Las Vegas was because of family and casinos. If I have then tomorrow I'm going to try asking them what they want to take on their vacations...but I probly won't have them, maybe on of them and then other kids ha ha. Oh by the way the fruit worked pretty good, for about 20 min (which is good). They said "I have one banana" and "I have one banana and one red apple" They ate the strawberries pretty fast, and it sort of started to dissolve, so that's when I changed it to taking a trip. And I am learning more Spanish from them every time I go. But this reminds me that I wanted to make a list of verbs for Jessica (hope I see her tomorrow), so that's it for now.

New adventure! Ha ha the hypocritical people of Arizona! These are the one who are so against immigration, who ride out in their trucks to catch undocumented people sneaking into the US, I mean these people are nuts! But ha ha guess what!!?? They all go to Algodonis for medicine, and doctor appts. I just went to this place in Baja (still Mexico), this town called Algodonis. It is a border town, into Arizona- I think at Yuma. This is the funniest place- and I mean funny strange not funny ha ha (well maybe a little ha ha). This place has literally hundreds of dentist, eye doctor & regular doctor offices! I started taking pictures when we first got there, but in 5 minutes had over 20 dentist offices, and then laughing I gave up. We didn't get there until after 5pm, so it was dark an hour later, but it was amazing! Eye doctor eye doctor eye doctor...I mean the offices are next to each other, the same thing with the dentists and MD's. This morning there were guys in front of the dentist offices offering a free screening...come on in! This is hilarious! And in between all these medical offices are stalls selling souvenirs...everything you can think of, I guess like all tourist areas, silver, ceramics, clothes, toys, things made of wood, metal sculptures, everything.

There's about 5500 people there, and of course alot of that must be kids..anyway one fun fact about the place is below (I googled it)
Los Algodones is the northernmost town in Mexico, and at its northeastern tip is the northernmost point in Mexico. Another interesting geographical distinction is that if someone were to travel in any of the four cardinal directions from anywhere in Algodones (due north, due east, due south, or due west), they would cross a U.S. border.

Now here's the reason I say hypocrites: The popularity of both inexpensive prescriptions and medical care catering to Canadian and US senior citizens have prompted a virtual explosion of pharmacies and dental offices which have largely displaced a great deal of the open-air shops and restaurants immediately across the border and have effectively shifted the town's focus from tourism to medicine. 

 Well we were only there last nite and earlier today (it's about 3 1/2 hours from here), but what I saw was license plate after license plate from Arizona, but I did see 2 from Calif. and none from Canada. We didn't see too many people on the street last nite; after we found Everardo's friend, a hotel and a bite to eat it was about 7pm, and the streets were deserted. Actually I asked a couple I saw on the patio of our hotel about places to grab some snacky food about 8pm, and they said- everything is all closed up in town! ha ha ha that's so funny cause everywhere else in Mexico, 8pm is when things start moving and shaking...but this morning what I saw was seniors! Lots of seniors! Walking on all the streets where the medical offices and curios were. Well there's only a couple or three streets with all that stuff and the rest is residential. And Everardo said everybody makes money there! NOt the vendors who sell the best- meaning salesmanship, or the best stuff- everybody. He saw at least 8 people he knew from when he worked there about 8 years ago, around the time he also lived here in Puerto Penasco. We talked to a guy selling silver, a lady selling leather goods, another with picture frames (beautiful and I want to go back there), one with ceramics and one with the metal stuff, including the scorpians- he said that guy taught him how to make them.

Anyway there were so many seniors out walking thru the area and this was about 8am. We went into a pharmacy- and get this!! They had- and this was on the shelf! Arimidex! $40USD for 28 pills and with a little talking I'm sure a little cheaper! This is the medicine I take for post breast cancer! Right now I pay a little over $400US per MONTH and never go to the doctor, but I need that prescription so I keep the coverage. I see my oncologist once a year, second year in a row, and pay almost $5K per year, and I still have a copy for the pills....so $140 per year for that too- oh so that just putsme over $5K. YOu know when people complain about undocumented Mexicans straining the health care system...hmmm now I gotta think- cause they ain't coming for health care!!! It's next to nothing down here. I paid $1800 for my last root canal in Calif, here I was quoted $200US- and that was down in Guerrero, I didn't ask in Algodonis ha ha. Yeah I know- that's not the reason they come, but still they get the medical care...but you know what? What the FUCK?? What is going on with health care in the US. I know it's not a new conversation, not a new issue. BUt again? What the FUCK? Why can Mexico offer medicine so cheap? Doctor visits so cheap???? Maybe cause it IS CHEAP??? What is the matter with us in the US? As always I have to think it's about greed and power. Why can the insurance companies charge so much? The pharmaceutical companies? The freaking doctors?? Yes the change has to be monumental, but it has to change!! Teachers don't make shit (at least below college levels and I am only not commenting about that cause I don't know), but doctors? Ha ha and don't even get me started on Sports players- but that's for another time.

So what will I do? About my medical coverage and medicine? Hmmm I'm not sure. I know what's going on in the US is wrong, but I am afraid for my own health...you know- the big C. Cancer...I am clear, had a lumpectomy in 2009, chemo and radiation, but my doctor wants me to take Arimidex until Nov of 2014. Yep I can do that, and get the pills here and let go of my insurance. The problem I see is, if I let it go, I'll never get coverage if/when I go back. That's why I never changed companies since I had cancer. I have Kaiser, and I like my doctor, but shit- $400 a month for nothing? If it comes back and I'm here, ok I will deal with it here in Mexico- they have excellent health care. But if we move back, then what do I do? Oh wait I know- move to Yuma so I can cross to Algodonis and get affordable health care. So for now, I will just let it bounce around in my pea brain. I have a mammogram appt coming up for late April, my once a year visit, maybe I'll decide after that. Then I will be 3 years clear..or 4 if I was diagnosed in May 2009? My treatment wasn't over until Nov of 2009, so not sure how to count it.

Ok- so the day trip was fun and turned into an overnite. We were lazing about yesterday (Sunday) and late morning I said hey let's go for a ride. Poppi (which apparently should be spelled Pappi in Spanish so I'll try to change) so Pappi said wanna drive out to see Santa Clara? Sure. So we take Sam and the car since better gas mileage, and proceed to drive an hour in the wrong dorection!! Towards Caborca..ooops, so an hour back and then head the right way. Well on the way he asks if we should go all the way to San Luis and I say sure again, and we end up 45 min past San Luis Rio Colorado in Algodonis, where Pappi finds his old friend who helped him get into rehab 8 years ago when he had a raging drug problem (5 years before he met me). So we find him and get to go to a Spanish speaking AA meeting literally next door to our very cute hotel. We had amazing quesadillas at a roadstand (basically how we eat out these days)  Now when you ask for a quesadilla with meat- is it just a big taco? Anyway they were to die for. Then this morning after walking around finding his old friends, we drove back thru San Luis Rio Colorado to Santa Clara. In both Algodonis & San Luis he showed places he lived, places he stayed before crossing the border. I asked about "the fence", which he said is not really a deterrent for anyone ha ha. We saw where the fence stops because it's an Indian Resrvation, we saw border guys down in these ravines that I assume used to be rivers- not sure why not anymore....Then in Santa Clara we ate the best head tacos. I know I know sounds yucky but they are the very best tacos. It's the same kind Everardo's cousins sell in Morelia. We got home in early afternoon, and just kicked back. Probly (I hope) gonna have eggs for dinner.

On Saturday nite Everardo got to chat with Eleana again and they must have talked for over 2 hours. He is very happy and I for him. He's letting her set the pace and I think that's smart. I looked into a Spanish class, and funny, there's a level 2 (not sure if that's me but I'm not a beginner), but thislevel 2 class has 2 other students- Karen and Mark- from the center ha ha!! So much for a little distance, but I really want to take the class- I need to do what I planned, get into a class here and get me closer to fluency. Everardo is all for it, even tho' it more money going out....when I talked to the guy he said either $5 or $6 an hour, but when he put me on the phone with the teacher, she said $8...and that this particular class, the students want 3 times a week- but I agree- 3 times a week is good..so $24 a week I guess I'll be spending...I hope Poppi- oops Pappi gets some work soon....he's talking to a couple of guys that have said he can work with them, but I think it's about a month away...Then also a friend Mike, seems to be some kind of big shot around here, and thinks he can help him get a construction job in a couple of months cause a huge project is about to start. But I want him to do what he really wants to do, and I think it might be selling trinkets to the tourists, and he thinks he can do pretty good. And he can always change his mind. This is supposed to be fun- and he was the lucky recipient in Playa Ventura of all the chores with the project house from hell, so what the HELL. I know I haven't made the best finiacial decisions...or I wouldn't be worrying about money, but now I want us both to be happy. So...we will just have to see how it goes. Maybe maybe maybe the Playa Ventura house will sell...

Hmmm time for a little reading and possibly a nap before dinner...

The dogs here can outrun the dog catcher truck!! We were leaving today and we saw these 2 dogs come flying around the corner and up our street away from us. Next thing we see if the dog catcher truck coming slowly up the same alley, but they turned our way instead of the way the dogs went. We both burst out laughing! Those dogs are so smart! And up in the direction they went, I saw some other dogs meeting up with them. There's usually 3 guys in the truck at a time, and they all where the little white face mask, but the dogs around here are smart, and I think they warn each other ha ha.

Anyway we were laughing at them, and they pointed to our car and yelled we had a flat. Damn. So my little car had a flat and no jack. Guess what we went shopping for? Well we hit up the auto parts place at the edge of town, got a jack and a new distributor cap for the truck, which Everardo's been talking about since we were in Playa Ventura, and when we got back he discovered the spare had no air...I came in and found a comfy spot to start my 3rd library book- as soon as I finish it and return them I get my library card..yippee (yeah I know- easily pleased). Well Pam showed me where the Rocky Point Times office was and that they have a ton of books (in English) that I can borrow...oh boy oh boy, cause the English books at the library are slim pickens. I'm going to give them mine as I finish them, but I only brought about 30 or 40, maybe less. I was thinking about bringing the 100 or so that I left in Playa Ventura, but I probly would use the room for other things.

So that's the next new thing- we have kinda decided to put the Playa Ventura trip. Not sure if I wrote about the trip here or not, but at first just Poppi was going to go, and then when he got back I'd go up to Petaluma. Then we decided to both go; get someone to stay here and take care of Sam and the house. Yeah- Sam had to stay cause he doesn't do great after 2-3 days of driving. And we figured we drive straight thru to get there, but do some exploring on the way back. Maybe go to Oaxaca, Mexico City- or out to the pyramids at least, back to Morelia to see his sister and brother again, maybe fix that tile on his mother's grave...in fact we were talking about being gone up to a month. But today Everardo brought it up again and said maybe we should wait a few months, until after he finds some work and we get some money coming in. Our plan was NOT to live on the rent we get from the Petaluma house; but we have been spending spending..I mean life happens. Ha ha the project house from hell in Playa Ventura, not so much here, but we had to buy furniture, a car, lots of little stuff...So Poppi is still waiting on the permit to be a vendor down at the beach and/or on the malecon, and now he thinks he can find something working for someone who already has a shop. I'm not worried, my hubby s a very resourceful guy so it will be interesting to see what comes next. So we will put the trip off for a while; we were only going to make an appearance, to show we care about the house, but we do have a guy taking care of it, so not going right now is the better financial decision. I have to go to California for my mammogram, so that trip has to be first, we agreed on that. And now there's even another reason that my trip is important...

This is huge news!!! Our lives are forever changed. In ways we don't know about yet, not sure what comes next, but my darling sweet loving husband is over the moon happy! Two nites ago, kinda late, maybe after 10pm, he got a facebook message. (yep thank God for FB) It was a woman named Kelly, and she is the mother of his 16 yr old daughter, who he has not seen since she was 4!!! He was in shock I think, at first anyway. They chatted, and then she gave him her phone number and he called her right then. She had been looking for him for awhile, and as people may or may not know, Mexican people have two last names; one from their mom and one from their dad.
Everardo uses only one, and of course, she looked for the other one, the one that came last. It's taken a couple of days to piece the story together, and I'm not comfortable telling it all here, after all it was all things that took place before I even knew him. Life is messy, and relationships, families are dysfunctional as hell sometimes. Add some drugs and alcohol, the law...Anyway his daughter got older, and asked for him, about him. Kelly reached out, and (thank you God) found us.

So Poppi got to facebook chat with his 16 year old daughter, Elena. He has her name and her face tattooed on his chest. She does not remember him, but her older brothers do a little I think. They called him dad, they are older than Elena, and Kelly had them when he met her, then they had Elena. She seems so sweet, she is very nervous, scared, and has- of course- a million questions. She only wants to chat right now, she didn't want to skype and talk face to face, but she does want to meet her dad. It was so very touching to watch my husband go thru all these emotions, he doesn't want to pressure her, he wants to go at her pace. He is so filled up with love. And gratitude. And love. We do have a small problem, Poppi cannot go to the states right now, not legally anyway. Our current plan is to apply for a visa for him in July, after we have been married 2 years. If he goes anyway and gets caught, they will never give him a visa. Right now Kelly is not willing to let Elena come visit us. She is afraid. I understand, this is her daughter, and this whole thing is very new. She also told Poppi, pls don't hurt my daughter, don't come into her life and then disappear. I understand that, too. I would do anything to spare my daughters from any hurt, any pain. He understands, too.

So we will go slow. At her and Elena's pace. I friended her on FB, and wrote to her in a private message to introduce myself. She wrote back and said glad to meet me; that she and Elena were looking forward to meeting me when I come up in April. They live just 3 towns above where we lived! Everardo told Elena she had 2 stepsisters, and told her about Drewy and Halla. She also wanted to know about her aunts and uncles and cousins, of which she has many in Gilroy (below San Francisco), and I am willing to take her (and her mom too if she wants to got) down to Gilroy to meet some of her Dad's family. When I go up there I'll probly introduce Drew and Halla to Elena too, if she wants- my girls are already excited about it, but I am sure this is all very overwhelming for Elena. Yes it's what she wants, but wow- meeting your dad for the first time? (since she doesn't remember him). So they chatted the last two nites in a row, for quite awhile, over an hour each time. She told him about school, her pets, and asked him lots of questions. He is just soooo happy, and I am sooo happy for him. Funny I didn't start with this subject when I started writing tonite, but it's a bit overwhelming for me as well, and I wasn't sure how to start. And truthfully I didn't want to forget about the dogs! It was so funny.

Ok other news. The neighbor moved in- really it's neighbors cause it's two women. Not sure what their relationship is. I know they are friends, but maybe lovers? Maybe the one is the care taker for the other, cause one has a medical condition; she has Lupis, and needs help. Tina is American (white) and Lupita is Mexican; Lupita's sister and brother-in-law live here in Penasco. They have a little white scruffy dog, maybe part poodle, named Sophie, very cute. So they seem nice enough; Tina is on vacation, and only cares about having internet, I haven;t heard them say anything about tv. We gave her the code for our internet so she doesn't have to pay for it for 3 months. She is a bit unsteady on her feet, bad equilibrium, but like I said, so far they seem nice.

I worked at the center yesterday; frustrating in the morning with some out of control little kids completely uninterested in learning anything, and then much better in the afternoon with 2 teenager girls and then 2 women who were very interested; they wrote down everything I wrote on the board. I tried to do some phrases, with the "5 W's" (who where what when why). I think it went pretty well. For tomorrow with the little ones, I have a bag of a basket of strawberries, red & green apples, bananas, and cactus (the kind you eat). So I'm gonna try to make it fun to learn colors and names of fruit.....wish me luck ha ha (buena suerte!) Ok I think I'm caught up- yeah I need to write more often cause I know I'm leaving out stuff, like Superbowl at Andas - didn't think I'd enjoy cause don't care about football but had a good time...and practicing my Spanish at the Spanish speaking AA meetings and at the center....ah well tomorrow...

I just looked at my stats for my blog and saw that someone viewed my page form Jordan! Very cool cause it's one of my favorite countries. Maybe it's even someone in my family. Yeah yeah he's my ex-husband, but my daughters are part Palestinian and all of their cousins and aunts and uncles, well I didn't divorce all of them! Viva Palestine! My favorite thing in Jordan was seeing these things called wazirs...yeah I'm sure I spelled it wrong- sounds like wha-zeer. Anyway it's a small stone thing with fresh water in it, in the very very olden days when travelers were passing thru, walking of course, they could stop for a cool drink of water. Just because. No cost, no obligation, just some water for a thirsty person walking by. Very cool. Of course there was lots of other cool stuff, like the Dead Sea, and these ruins which I have forgotten the name of, no I think maybe Jareesh- they were right in or very near Amman, we toured that area with a kid, I think his name was Aher, and he had followed the tour guides around and learned the spiel, so he could do it himself. he was very good, a really smart kid, and at the end some officials chased him away, but nicely, and we were still able to pay him. He wanted to address all his comments to the American woman ha ha- he called me Madam. I also really enjoyed another place - Petra (where that scene from Raiders of the Lost Ark was filmed). This is a city built into the rock, so fantastic, we rode thru on camels, except for Drewy, who was scared to climb on a camel and rode a donkey ha ha. Jordan is an amazing country full of beautiful people. Ok bye for now.

Interesting week. The cool thing is that we are finally painting. It's almost done. Purple, green, red, and a melon orange. The green is only for the kitchen, but it seems like there maybe left over everything, so the dining room might get painted, too. Yippee. Red for the one big wall. Purple for the shorter wall that has the recess in it, green for the wall with the arch....anyway I am so happy to be making this a home. It really brightened it up too. The whole house I mean- it's kinda small and I was worried that bright colors would make it seem smaller, but it doesn't. Now I gotta figure out where to put all the photos and pictures. Which also means it's time to get the glass fixed in my favorite picture- it's these 3 women riding bicycles. I paid $10 for it 26 years ago in a second hand store. I know it was 26 years ago, cause Drewy was 1 year old and she and I just moved to our own apartment and I went to the second hand store looking for things I could afford ha ha. Those ladies looked free, happy, ready to take on the world and it was exactly what I needed at the time. I had them ever since, its been up in every place I lived in. It was up in the living room in Playa Ventura, and then the glass got cracked on the way up here. I gave Drewy some of the artwork we had in Petaluma, and only saved a Peter Max lithograph which is in our bedroom, it's the only thing worth money....and a copy of a Monet I saw in the Impressionist museum in Paris- the one kinda next to the Louve. It is lilies and a bridge, I actually got choked up when I saw it in person.

It's funny, tomorrow we will be here 2 months, and I feel more at home than I did after 6 months in Playa Ventura. I kept trying to "make PV my home", you know? Make it. But you just can't force things to be what you want them to be....I've certainly tried that enough times in my life ha ha. And yeah the easy answer is that there are English speakers here, and consistent internet, consistent telephone, consistent tv, consistent electricity, oh and AA meetings... I feel safe driving, it's safe to go out at nite time, the stores always have dairy products like milk and you can always find eggs. HA HA is that the EASY answer? Well it does sum it up pretty good. And the fact is I'm not around all that much English, really only at AA, and I go to both English & Spanish meetings. But it is there, and I know I can find it. Well and the other thing is this community center. I'm getting pretty attached out there and I like it alot.

Oh, well I guess the director out there speaks English, and her main assistant (I guess that's what she is) is Mexican and speaks English. Teaching the kids is kinda like Playa Ventura- I mostly teach the same thing over and over cause I don't get the same kids 2 days in a row... A couple know a few words in English, but I can also see I need to get more creative- they like shouting out the colors with the flash cards, and are slowly learning the days of the week, but it's too much of just words on the paper. So I'm thinking next week to bring some fruits and maybe veges- like a banana, a red apple, a green apple, an orange, ....give one thing to each kid and say ok this is you. Banana. Get them to learn their fruit, then try to do the other kids....I don't know, but they wanted to color the other day and we all colored a picture of a dog, and the I'd ask what the color was in English. They all thought mine was so funny cause I used blue and red and green...The other thing that surprised me was, I was trying to teach them eyes, ears, nose, mouth, etc, so I had a small white board and drew a face on it, with hair, and teeth, too. Someone asked if it was me so I said yes. Then they all thought that was hilarious and one had to write Teresa (they call me Teresa cause it's easier to say than Terry), and wanted to put earrings, and fix my eyes and stuff. I need a bigger whiteboard ha ha!!

Yeah a bigger whiteboard would be great- too bad I left it in Playa Ventura. But you know what? These kids just need attention. I mean yeah, it's good to learn English, and they are learning some words, but I am no teacher, and if I discipline them or "make them" do it, they simply won't come back, so I need to make it fun. And it seems to me, that what Karen has said, and now Anida (the assistant) say is true. Just spend time with them, give them attention. Anida, and I shouldn't say assistant cause this woman does everything, she makes the food they serve every day- or supervises it, she works on English with this women who are indigenous Mexicans- Indians I think- who don't speak Spanish- maybe Mayan or Aztec language (yeah I need to study Mexican history I know), she translates for everyone, coordinates activities, assigns jobs, etc. Anyway she told me I am helping her cause on top of everything else, the kids were constantly asking her for anything, everything. She said the parents don't pay attention to them, they just need to touch you, to hug, to hold your hand. This I can do. I know that some parents are trying to work, some have soooo many kids, some are struggling to survive and trying, but they are just so down trodden....I am not the judge of anyone and especially not these people. I don't believe any of them are simply selfish and ignoring their kids. This is a hard life for these people. In fact it is heartbreaking. I'm kinda overwhelmed by how hard their lives are. I drive out to this area, it's a neighborhood, and some houses (termed loosely) are cardboard and wood planks- like from a fence, some are random pieces of wood nailed together. Maybe a camper shell, a trailer here and there. Some are houses, and there are some of the gov't houses- which I saw inside when we first got here- small but efficient...there's an old man, in his 80's that lives in his old car.

And I guess the "missions" people do help, cause I gave a ride home to a guy the other day; he had done 200 hours of service at (I think) the community center, or somewhere out there- he lived in a camper shell, and they built him a house. He proudly showed it to my friend Anda and I; it was 2 rooms, just like the ones that my daughter Halla and built in Rosarita when we came down with a friend's church group a few years ago. He was very proud cause he had a real bed. This guy is probly in his 60's, maybe younger but just made old by his environment, but he was happy. I had to not choke up when we were there. Sometimes I have to detach...ok lots of the time I have to detach; I know I cannot fix everything and/or everyone. I think I said here before that the frst time I went to Thailand I was so upset when I got home. There is just so much poverty in this world. So many have nots. I am a have. We need to share. So I will stick with this community center. You know it's so hard sometimes- I mean the US give billions to other countries every freaking year. Why do they not want to help their neighbor- Mexico? Help Mexico build up their infrastructure, create a sustainable economy? Create jobs? If Mexicans had jobs, had some kind of way to feed their families, get an education, do you think so many would come to the states? I KNOW the answer to this folks. I lived all my life in California, where we have lots and lots of Mexican, legally and not so much. The Mexican people I talk to tell me- of course they would rather live in their country, but what would you do to feed your kids? Young people tell me they want education, to make some money. That the opportunities in the states are so much better. They have hope. So why don't we help them to help themselves? Well I guess it's the fucked up politics of both nations. I believe the US govt is happy with the drug trade, and both sides make money. I know it's much more than that, but whatever it is, it is about money power and greed for the few, and screw the many.

There's a lady here who is part of the solution, she works with Karen (the lady at the center), and she was complaining about the attitude of some of the people she's trying to help. Now as far as I know she was just grumbling, cause her life is this thing- helping, and spending her own money to provide resources and time. They are trying to help these women find ways to be productive, make things that they sell, teach some business training classes so they cam make their own business. Provide things to help people start up a business, like hot dog carts, or washing machines. So she is very dedicated, and I'm sure she was just tired and frustrated. But there are so many factors. These are people who have lived in poverty all their lives, maybe generations. People who have nothing and if these crazy American women want to give them things- they will take them. She can't understand why if they have a dollar today, they spend it today- well hell maybe they won't have it tomorrow. I think a few will be able to understand the business concepts, a few will care, some will continue to simply survive. There are so many pieces of it that I can't define, some that I don't understand or am even aware of. Life here is soooo different. And yet I feel like I belong here. For now. I am also lucky cause I'm married to a Mexican who can see things maybe we cannot, at least at first. So I'm gonna stick with these women for now, see how/where I can contribute.

Oh- the new neighbor didn't show up until tonite so I have no report. I guess they had a tough time finding their way here.....welcome to Mexico...where everything is possible AND everything is hard.

So the roof is fixed AND we bought the paint. And it rained again, hard, but no leaks. The entire roof has not yet been covered, but Everardo has one bucket of stuff left and will try to get it done tomorrow before any more surprise rain. Cause after this weekend, everyone breathed a sigh of relief that the "freak rain" had passed, and then Sunday nite and yesterday (Monday), it rained.

Ha ha after I added up the expenses plus paying the landlord's water and electric bill, our rent for Fev will be about $24. And that's not counting the paint. I went by myself to get the paint and Poppi wants to choose the rollers & brushes, so it's not all accounted for yet- and I'll just deduct it from March rent. Anyway I'm so excited about the paint. Reds, a melon shade of orange, purple, and green. The green, purple and melon are for the kitchen, purple, red and melon for the living room and the hallway that connects both rooms. We are not painting any other rooms- the dining room or the bedrooms....weeelllll..I bought a gallon of each. Except for the melon, it should be more than enough of the other three...so maybe one wall in the dining room or one wall in our bedroom, vamos a ver. Both bedroom are green, so I wouldn't use the green cause mine is a bright strong color, and our rooms are a light, almost antique green, so only the red or purple would work. Not sure when we will paint, but it will be soon...did I say YIPEE??

We are getting neighbors on Friday from Feb 1 to May 1. I knew we were getting a woman, but I think she is coming with another woman or a friend or someone who is only staying for a little while- but that was according to the landlord who I have already alluded to as a little nutty. I received an email from Tina- the new temporary neighbor, and she said "we brought almost our whole house" so it sounds like family....The thing is we share a yard, the little bungalow is about 25 feet away from us so we will probly interact at least some. We have a fenced and gated yard, a washing machine and a clothes line. Well there's a dryer too, but we don't use it, ha ha don't want to pay for the electricity. We get billed every 2 months, and we just got the bill. It was 326 pesos, so about $26.50 for 2 months, yeah we can deal with that. Of course our heater is gas, and our hot water is gas, and I know at least for the heater we've spent 125 pesos per tank, maybe 4 times in Dec and 4 in Jan (ok 1000 pesos or $81), then the hot water heater lasts 2 months for $13....ok gas for 2 months: $94 + $26.50=  $120.50 so $60.25 for gas and electric for 2 months- 2 VERY cold months ha ha. Hopefully by the end of Feb we will drop off the heater. We only use it at nite, but from about 7pm until 7am..ok 12 hours.

Anyway- we will be sharing the outside space, not a big deal- we will just have to be diligent about dog poop duty ha ha. And that's not too hard. As for the outside, I like to sit in a lunge chair and read...altho as soon as it gets warm enough I will begn to campaign for my hammock to be put up. Not as easy as I thought at first, since the trees are not string enough, Poppi will have to put a bolt in the back wall that goes across the yard and the wall of the house. Poor Poppi has a "to do" list that is growing...and I wonder how many cars, if any they will have. I'm kinda asuming at least one, that they're driving down since they are coming from San Diego. Like I said, we'll see. Maybe I'll have first impressions as early as Friday ha ha.

Although Friday I'm going out to the community center to help with inventory of the things the women make to sell at the art fairs.Today was my first Tuesday out there and it went well. Organized chaos I think; before lunch I got a few boys who were competing to do the colors, and after lunch I had a woman who really wants to learn. I worked with her for about an hour,and later this afternoon I was in this stationary stye store and I bought her an English Spanish dictionary. I will have to sneak it to her cause I don't plan on buying one for everyone, but she is so motivated, and I want to help her to help herself. We have some kid dictionaries that I donated to the center for the kids to use. Well I can feel the ice cream calling me from the freezer, so gotta go.