Ha! Everybody knows not to run downhill...right? Or don't eat yellow snow. Well have you ever seen a dog catch a fish?
That's my Sam the wonder dog! Ha ha ok but what about running downhill? Ok the other morning I was on the trail doing my morning hike. I'm getting better; I run parts of the trail now. The first time I walked the trail it took me an hour and a half. Now it takes me right around an hour. When I run parts of it I can do it up to 5 minutes less than an hour. So Thursday I was trying to beat my time since I was running and still ok. I came around a corner that was sloping down- I was at the end of the trail where it comes down out of the hills. After the corner I decided to run to the next corner ( I usually don't ever run on the downhill parts and never around the corners going down- but Thursday was sooo focused ha ha). My foot hit a rock (or maybe a root) and when I tried to catch myself with my other foot, that one landed in leaves so I slipped and man when I hit the ground it hurt! Skinned bothe elbows, wrists, scraped my palms, and have a huge scratch on the front of one leg above the ankle and another big bruise on the opposite thigh. Rung my bell! Seems like the ground has gotten harder!
When I was drinking I fell down alot! I always had bruises that I didn't know how I got them. I fell off things and thru things..was always bumping into things. But it's been 15 years since I had a drink, and I just don't fall down that much ha ha! I'm amazed about how far I can run though. I mostly run on the flat portions or the uphill, and there's plenty of both. I read somewhere that running thru the woods is really good because the terrain is constantly changing, and that's true. I have to look at the ground the entire time- roots, rocks, and banana slugs, salamanders. I want to see those things. I want to see the deer, the turkeys, and the rabbits along the trail. Sometimes while I'm walking I do see those things. I see birds, I hear birds, I hear how the wind sounds thru the trees. Different in different trees. I hear water as I get closer to it. There's not as water in the creeks that run thru the woods as there was a month ago. But there's still some, little waterfalls and places where it's more...I think I go over 4 little bridges. The first one is a bigger bridge; it's blue and it's in the first 10-12 minutes or so. I know when I get to that blue bridge that the worst of it is already over. The steep uphill that starts my workout.
First I walk up a path, the slow steady incline- hate those right? It goes thru the park, up by this archery area, and then heads into the woods. I walk past this baby pine tree, and now it has really bright green starts on the ends of it's branches. I say "good morning beautiful tree" as I walk by. That helps me think of something besides how mush I hate the beginning of my walk- that slow steady incline. I think of how grateful I am that I get to walk in such a beautiful place. That I'm clean & sober and have the awareness to be grateful for a baby pine tree, a blue bridge across a stream in the woods, the feel of my own legs pushing, pushing harder to carry me along the trail. When I start into the woods the path continues to climb as it goes around the back of the hill, then a much steeper climb with switchbacks. Now maybe to an experienced runner and hiker it's baby stuff- my husband runs the whole way. I think running this part would be awesome because every single morning I think I'm not going to make it to the blue bridge. After the blue bridge the path is kinda level for a little while, then climbs and drops and turns but mush less steeply. It pops out onto a main trail but I run up and continue up another hill that comes to a loop. I try to make it to the beginning of the loop in 25 minutes, sometimes I make it, sometimes it takes me a little longer.
The very cool thing about the loop is the one section of redwoods. I call it the enchanted forest. I never run in that part. I say good morning family. That part always fills me up...with love, with gratitude. I can feel my family when I'm there. Sometimes I tell my mom & dad and grandma and grandpa and grandma that I love them. After that it seems easy to run the rest of the way. But I gotta not run the downhill part!
So it's Sunday evening and I'm feeling pretty good about myself. I've been having a really hard time making it thru the weekends meeting the commitment I made to myself about food. I've blown it just about every weekend for the past couple of months. That would be fine if I was already at my goal weight, or close to it. I exercise every week day for at least an hour. This past Friday it was pouring rain so I couldn't hike and it was windy as well so I didn't want to dance (and honestly....I danced about a week ago, and the jumping hurt where my incision was, so I'm kinda worried about it, and decided to wait another month). But that's ok because I have my elliptical! So I jumped on that machine Friday morning for my workout. And I kinda dance when I'm on it... I sing out loud and swing around (even when I'm on one at the gym- never cared who looked at me- I am in the zone!) Funny thing- after hiking for the past couple of months I didn't realize how much stronger my legs are! I was killing it on the elliptical- the dancing is great cardio, good for my whole body, but I guess the hiking and walk/running it, well is making my legs stronger.
Ok so I workout. And I'm doing good with my food ....during the week...but I keep blowing it on the weekends. Last week our niece Stephanie came to see us; she's the one who lived with us for a year before we moved to Mexico. That was my excuse. The week before- I don't know- I think we were down in Santa Rosa or something- again no excuse because I could have made better choices but I didn't. Easter I had to eat lots of chocolate! And we barbecued for Drew and her friend Cory and her 2 kids...there were lots of good choices for me, but I didn't make them....I swear I could smell the chocolate.....and I also swear I could hear it calling me...(ok maybe that part's not entirely true).
So what's been happening is on Monday mornings I wake up and feel bad about myself. Like a failure. Like I could do better. Like I should do better. I know I need to give myself a break. But I also know that I do KNOW how to stick with the plan I made for myself. I did it for a year and a half. See I'm starting year 3 this month (April) but I have been up and down between 154 & 165 since the beginning of October. But even at 165 I'm down 64 pounds! It is a huge huge huge difference...in my life, in my mind, for my health. It started as me trying to control something in my life- because I felt so powerless over having cancer. And maybe I can't stop it from coming back, but I can certainly do some preventive things...like being a healthy weight, eating healthy, exercising, having a healthy lifestyle. Ok anyway this weekend- I DID IT! The nite is not over yet, so plenty of time to blow it, but just writing this motivates me. And yesterday and last nite my body was in total defiance- it kept telling me to feed it- some sugar, some chocolate....something! A cheeseburger, some chips...something! And because I know I made nutritious choices for my 1200 calories, I knew that the cravings had to be in my head. I try to eat 1200 calories or less every day. And I try for things that fill me up. My next official weigh day is Tuesday and I know I will be happy. Crab season finally opened and we're going to buy some more that I can divide into portions of 8 ounces and freeze it. Yeah I know- fresh crab is best, but when we crack it and freeze it, it tastes pretty damn good when I thaw it out and make my little crab louie.
But I do have to keep working on my stinking thinking. I have always been an emotional eater. You know- food is love. Food is a reward, a relief, a comfort. When I'm sad I want comfort food- like macaroni and cheese. When I'm mad or stressed I crave chocolate. Sometimes I crave salt...nit sure what emotion goes with it ha ha. But I notice when I'm busy, or having a good time, hours can go by and I don't think about eating. So maybe it's a bit of a problem when I'm home so much...I kinda cruise the kitchen...eating is a habit- almost like smoking. So I can work on it. And luckily Everardo is not a crap eater- he snacks on fruit or vegetables. We have a kitchen full of green apples, bananas, oranges, cut up cantaloupe. I also have these ginger cookies from Trader Joes, they're tiny and 10 calories each. I can't really eat more than three or it the ginger bothers my stomach. I also have some protein bars (kashi brand I really like). They have chocolate bits and/or almonds, I have some Fiber one low calorie treats. I can't completely cut out things or I'll just explode and binge at some point. One thing I really miss is french bread- man I love it so much....but bread is bread...I eat these small round breads....because i need something to hold my natural peanut butter! (which I eat every day) If I had to only have one food the rest of my life it would be peanut butter. Ok my thinking. I don't need much...and I need to recognize the cravings when they start. But I just came to that conclusion- and it happened because I'm writing it here. I have to pay attention. I need to remember that the gift of awareness is one I need to use every day. 15 years ago my habit was drinking, and today it never enters my mind. I just need to let go of snacking. Pick up a pencil and write something instead of picking up a handful of cookies or chips. Hmmm good idea...I'll try it this week. Ok so I think I'm done for now. So I'll finish with another picture of my amazing dog Sam. Love him sooo much! Viva!
That's my Sam the wonder dog! Ha ha ok but what about running downhill? Ok the other morning I was on the trail doing my morning hike. I'm getting better; I run parts of the trail now. The first time I walked the trail it took me an hour and a half. Now it takes me right around an hour. When I run parts of it I can do it up to 5 minutes less than an hour. So Thursday I was trying to beat my time since I was running and still ok. I came around a corner that was sloping down- I was at the end of the trail where it comes down out of the hills. After the corner I decided to run to the next corner ( I usually don't ever run on the downhill parts and never around the corners going down- but Thursday was sooo focused ha ha). My foot hit a rock (or maybe a root) and when I tried to catch myself with my other foot, that one landed in leaves so I slipped and man when I hit the ground it hurt! Skinned bothe elbows, wrists, scraped my palms, and have a huge scratch on the front of one leg above the ankle and another big bruise on the opposite thigh. Rung my bell! Seems like the ground has gotten harder!
When I was drinking I fell down alot! I always had bruises that I didn't know how I got them. I fell off things and thru things..was always bumping into things. But it's been 15 years since I had a drink, and I just don't fall down that much ha ha! I'm amazed about how far I can run though. I mostly run on the flat portions or the uphill, and there's plenty of both. I read somewhere that running thru the woods is really good because the terrain is constantly changing, and that's true. I have to look at the ground the entire time- roots, rocks, and banana slugs, salamanders. I want to see those things. I want to see the deer, the turkeys, and the rabbits along the trail. Sometimes while I'm walking I do see those things. I see birds, I hear birds, I hear how the wind sounds thru the trees. Different in different trees. I hear water as I get closer to it. There's not as water in the creeks that run thru the woods as there was a month ago. But there's still some, little waterfalls and places where it's more...I think I go over 4 little bridges. The first one is a bigger bridge; it's blue and it's in the first 10-12 minutes or so. I know when I get to that blue bridge that the worst of it is already over. The steep uphill that starts my workout.
First I walk up a path, the slow steady incline- hate those right? It goes thru the park, up by this archery area, and then heads into the woods. I walk past this baby pine tree, and now it has really bright green starts on the ends of it's branches. I say "good morning beautiful tree" as I walk by. That helps me think of something besides how mush I hate the beginning of my walk- that slow steady incline. I think of how grateful I am that I get to walk in such a beautiful place. That I'm clean & sober and have the awareness to be grateful for a baby pine tree, a blue bridge across a stream in the woods, the feel of my own legs pushing, pushing harder to carry me along the trail. When I start into the woods the path continues to climb as it goes around the back of the hill, then a much steeper climb with switchbacks. Now maybe to an experienced runner and hiker it's baby stuff- my husband runs the whole way. I think running this part would be awesome because every single morning I think I'm not going to make it to the blue bridge. After the blue bridge the path is kinda level for a little while, then climbs and drops and turns but mush less steeply. It pops out onto a main trail but I run up and continue up another hill that comes to a loop. I try to make it to the beginning of the loop in 25 minutes, sometimes I make it, sometimes it takes me a little longer.
The very cool thing about the loop is the one section of redwoods. I call it the enchanted forest. I never run in that part. I say good morning family. That part always fills me up...with love, with gratitude. I can feel my family when I'm there. Sometimes I tell my mom & dad and grandma and grandpa and grandma that I love them. After that it seems easy to run the rest of the way. But I gotta not run the downhill part!
So it's Sunday evening and I'm feeling pretty good about myself. I've been having a really hard time making it thru the weekends meeting the commitment I made to myself about food. I've blown it just about every weekend for the past couple of months. That would be fine if I was already at my goal weight, or close to it. I exercise every week day for at least an hour. This past Friday it was pouring rain so I couldn't hike and it was windy as well so I didn't want to dance (and honestly....I danced about a week ago, and the jumping hurt where my incision was, so I'm kinda worried about it, and decided to wait another month). But that's ok because I have my elliptical! So I jumped on that machine Friday morning for my workout. And I kinda dance when I'm on it... I sing out loud and swing around (even when I'm on one at the gym- never cared who looked at me- I am in the zone!) Funny thing- after hiking for the past couple of months I didn't realize how much stronger my legs are! I was killing it on the elliptical- the dancing is great cardio, good for my whole body, but I guess the hiking and walk/running it, well is making my legs stronger.
Ok so I workout. And I'm doing good with my food ....during the week...but I keep blowing it on the weekends. Last week our niece Stephanie came to see us; she's the one who lived with us for a year before we moved to Mexico. That was my excuse. The week before- I don't know- I think we were down in Santa Rosa or something- again no excuse because I could have made better choices but I didn't. Easter I had to eat lots of chocolate! And we barbecued for Drew and her friend Cory and her 2 kids...there were lots of good choices for me, but I didn't make them....I swear I could smell the chocolate.....and I also swear I could hear it calling me...(ok maybe that part's not entirely true).
So what's been happening is on Monday mornings I wake up and feel bad about myself. Like a failure. Like I could do better. Like I should do better. I know I need to give myself a break. But I also know that I do KNOW how to stick with the plan I made for myself. I did it for a year and a half. See I'm starting year 3 this month (April) but I have been up and down between 154 & 165 since the beginning of October. But even at 165 I'm down 64 pounds! It is a huge huge huge difference...in my life, in my mind, for my health. It started as me trying to control something in my life- because I felt so powerless over having cancer. And maybe I can't stop it from coming back, but I can certainly do some preventive things...like being a healthy weight, eating healthy, exercising, having a healthy lifestyle. Ok anyway this weekend- I DID IT! The nite is not over yet, so plenty of time to blow it, but just writing this motivates me. And yesterday and last nite my body was in total defiance- it kept telling me to feed it- some sugar, some chocolate....something! A cheeseburger, some chips...something! And because I know I made nutritious choices for my 1200 calories, I knew that the cravings had to be in my head. I try to eat 1200 calories or less every day. And I try for things that fill me up. My next official weigh day is Tuesday and I know I will be happy. Crab season finally opened and we're going to buy some more that I can divide into portions of 8 ounces and freeze it. Yeah I know- fresh crab is best, but when we crack it and freeze it, it tastes pretty damn good when I thaw it out and make my little crab louie.
But I do have to keep working on my stinking thinking. I have always been an emotional eater. You know- food is love. Food is a reward, a relief, a comfort. When I'm sad I want comfort food- like macaroni and cheese. When I'm mad or stressed I crave chocolate. Sometimes I crave salt...nit sure what emotion goes with it ha ha. But I notice when I'm busy, or having a good time, hours can go by and I don't think about eating. So maybe it's a bit of a problem when I'm home so much...I kinda cruise the kitchen...eating is a habit- almost like smoking. So I can work on it. And luckily Everardo is not a crap eater- he snacks on fruit or vegetables. We have a kitchen full of green apples, bananas, oranges, cut up cantaloupe. I also have these ginger cookies from Trader Joes, they're tiny and 10 calories each. I can't really eat more than three or it the ginger bothers my stomach. I also have some protein bars (kashi brand I really like). They have chocolate bits and/or almonds, I have some Fiber one low calorie treats. I can't completely cut out things or I'll just explode and binge at some point. One thing I really miss is french bread- man I love it so much....but bread is bread...I eat these small round breads....because i need something to hold my natural peanut butter! (which I eat every day) If I had to only have one food the rest of my life it would be peanut butter. Ok my thinking. I don't need much...and I need to recognize the cravings when they start. But I just came to that conclusion- and it happened because I'm writing it here. I have to pay attention. I need to remember that the gift of awareness is one I need to use every day. 15 years ago my habit was drinking, and today it never enters my mind. I just need to let go of snacking. Pick up a pencil and write something instead of picking up a handful of cookies or chips. Hmmm good idea...I'll try it this week. Ok so I think I'm done for now. So I'll finish with another picture of my amazing dog Sam. Love him sooo much! Viva!
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