Ok now I'm just having Playa Ventura flashbacks!! It rained all nite...and dripped into our bedroom. Actually I woke up and said I think I hear drips in the house, and Poppi said, no it's outside, go back to sleep, which I did. However! It was dripping inside the house; he knew, but it wasn't bad and he wanted me to sleep since we weren't gonna do anything about it in the middle of the nite.

So he checked again about 5 am  and it was only hitting the floor so we dozed in and out until close to 8am. Then I got up too and we turned on lights and saw at least 5 spots where water was leaking down in drips, on my bedside table, on the floor and a slow drip onto the bed. Also a drip on the shelf that holds the towels, yuck. I took pictures of all the spots, then walked thru the rest of the house, and found leaks in the living room, the hallway between the living room and kitchen, the spare bedroom, the kitchen and beginning of one in the dining room. Yep- juz like downtown.....

Just like Playa Ventura! Except when the big storm came and the water poured under the windows; it was about 2 inches high on the living room floor- I was freaking out in the middle of the nite. We still has piles of unpacked stuff, well out of boxes but not put anywhere...Here we are ok, Everardo tore the big green plastic garbage bags and put them over everything in out bedroom. If it rains tonite we'll sleep in the living room- the couch is wide and comfy, we both nap on it all the time.

So I sent a "BIG PROBLEM" email to the landlady and she wrote back right away and told us to go ahead and fix it, but that she didn't know it was a problem WRONG! Looking at the ceiling, no way it didn't leak last year! In fact when we first moved in Everardo talked to her about putting that sealant stuff on the roof. She agreed, acknowledged that it had been a problem, but said she'd get the sealant and bring it or send it down....this woman is a wack job. I asked my friend is this is normal for this area and time of year. She says no- that it hardly rains here ever- and not this time of year. So my greedy landlady probly thought she wouldn't have to spend the money for a few months. I guess that was a safe guess for her, unfortunately she was wrong. But still, we knew by looking at he ceiling when we first got here that it had leaked before....

I swear the rain followed us from Playa Ventura!! So I guess no buying paint today? Did I write yesterday? Did I say she sent us an email and said we could buy paint & deduct it from the rent, and paint? I was so happy! Yesterday I went to the paint store for the little sample sticks and brought a bunch home to choose colors. I spent last nite choosing, and it will be alot like Playa Ventura and Petaluma; I like shades of purple, green, oranges (sort of melon), and reds. This is a very small area, but it has funny corners, so I found  away to make it work. So the paint has to wait...I guess until we can deduct it from March rent ha ha.

I can't believe...it rained last nite! This is the place where it's only supposed to rain 2 inches- or less- per year, and it's during the summer! This is the 3rd or 4th time it's rained. Ok ok it was during the nite, and at first I thought I dreamed it, Everardo waking me up saying do you hear the rain (of course the correct answer should have been NO cause I was sleeping!) but  I only said oh, yep I hear it and went back to sleep. Then this morning I told him about my dream and he laughed- oh- not a dream. And it hasn't rained all day, and it's not cold outside but the air has that feeling to it like it might rain, or that the air is actually full of raindrops that might explode into raindrops at any minute, so I don't know if it will rain again or not....Although when I was at the community center today talking to Karen (the director), she said this was unusual, that it really doesn't rain much here, I told her I think we brought the rain up here with us from Guerrero ha ha.

 The community center; I went today and it was great! Now that I have a car I can go Tue & Thurs. I wanted to talk to Karen before I did the class, and I'm so glad I did. It's funny, she said what days/times would work for me! I said I am available whatever days & times they want since I have a car. I asked if teaching English was the best thing for the kids. Because I wanted to be sure this was not about my ego, but about them. I could do whatever needed doing out there...ok well except for....cooking, sewing, any artsy craftsy stuff, toilet cleaning...ok ok I guess I could clean a toilets if I really had to....ha ha..-actually there is also a business side and next Friday I'm going down there to help make an inventory spreadsheet to catalog the items the women make out there, and be able to account for them as they get sold and the women receive the money for the items. But, they (Karen, Mark and Onida) all think teaching English is a good idea. That maybe for some, when they get older, to get jobs- in the resort areas, or the big box stores, etc. And this area has alot of English speakers Also, and to me maybe more important, they said that just coming and spending time with these kids matters. Maybe we do 15 minutes of English class and the rest of the time playing a game, or singing, or walking to the park with the swings and naming things in English. That I can just hang around and see what works, for everyone.

So today I had so much fun out there. I went out into the main area after talking to them, and there were 2 girls playing Monopoly so I sat down and pretty soon I was helping read the cards and figuring out rent, and buying the properties. It was really fun, and as it got closer to lunchtime more kids showed up. So then we started picking out things and saying the name in Spanish first and then English. As the kids started to scatter a couple of adults (I think a man & wife) were saying the words so I asked if they wanted to learn English and they said yes. So I gave them a couple of sheets I had; one with the days of the week, and one with "the 5 W's" You know- who, where, what, when, why, next to the Spanish words, telling them if they learn those 5 words, they can ask anything in English. So they had to go but want to come back when I'm here. After their lunch some kids asked for me so I sat back down and did the colors. Then my bag of 10 items to name. I started with 3 kids and then I had 7 kids and one adult. The we did eyes, ears, nose, mouth, butt, hair, head.....anyway we had fun. When I left, there were about 5 little girls outside and they all ran up to my car window, they all wanted to say goodbye, they all wanted hugs, then kisses. I remembered almost all their names.

I enjoyed it so much. But the important thing is that those kids had fun, and just mighta learned a little something..well maybe, but now I know they important thing is smiles and laughter. I like this community center; I like the way they are trying to help people to help themselves. You know, she even gives away dog food, but told me today she has decided she'll only give it if the person agrees to get their dogs fixed- male or female, and there's a free clinic right there- they do it on Saturdays. And helping people who are interested, in planting vege gardens in their yards. I think there's other stuff also going on cause I see different people there busy doing things..anyway I've now had a couple of talks with Karen and I like how she looks at things.

So Everardo and I both got home around 3pm and went back out. Sam was crazy jumping all over us when we got home- that dog is SO smart- he remembered that Poppi asked him early this morning if he wanted to go to the beach! So off to the beach we went and let Sam run like crazy after the ball for about 20 minutes. Then we took a drive and I saw where his friend Nicco lives, and the front of their house is a combination cyber cafe and little store, and met his wife. He wasn't home but Everardo bought a soda and we chatted with his wife. It's funny- I said I really liked Nicco, and then they kept talking- the conversation was in Spanish, but back in the truck he said he told her that I like him as a friend. I said- what? I'm standing with you, introduced as your wife and I say say I really like Nicco? What the hell else would I mean by that. But he said in Spanish that's just how it sounds and was the right thing for him to say...hmmmmm...some stuff escapes me!

Anyway then we were looking for this segunda (second hand store) I heard about on Freemont St. We found it and took a look; but it was pretty high end seconds; I don't want to pay $100US for a tiny table to put in the bathroom for my water pitcher & glass for morning teeth brushing....I was thinking more about 100 pesos (about $8US), but it was fun looking for it. While we were looking for the store,  we decided to buy tacos for dinner cause it was getting close to 5 and Everardo has a commitment for an AA meeting from 5-6:30. We stopped across the street from a taco place and I saw a hamburger place across the street the other way. So I mentioned it and Poppi asked if I wanted a burger....hmmm it had been months! I had a burger in Houston back in Sept, and before that was June- at this place in Petaluma that has the best juicy cheeseburgers! We used to call ahead and order them then go pick them up to eat at home- oh Walnut Grill it's called. So, I said yes, but hoped it wasn't like the Sushi place we tried that was so awful all we could do was laugh...However!! Fantastic cheeseburgers and fries!! Yippee. I mean I don't crave cheeseburgers, but every once in a while, yeah one would be good. And this place is not too far from here. I just have to go up the street to the corner with the big church on one side, and a restaurant called Michoa Michoacan on the other, oh and of course a taco place, too, and turn left...go about 6 blocks and- it was called Star Burger. The thing about the taco stands, most of them don't open until after 6pm. But the long burros (long burritos- it's a certain style) are really good and they are always open all the time. And you can't get churros until after 6pm either....

Well it's Thursday and every day this week I have gotten up and worked out on my elliptical and the sit up thing, and I feel pretty good. With the 5pm meeting Poppi has, we've been eating dinner around 4pm, then maybe a snack later. So we'll see how that works- but it has to be better than eating a full dinner after 7pm. I've actually been going some nites with him to the meeting; I like this one, I like the air in there, just the feeling in the room. As for the shares, well some people talk slow enough for me to get some of it, but little by little I get more and more. And I share sometimes, too. Limited, halting, and now I know I need to look up some words I want to use, like choose, choices, willing, willingness, pain, gratitude, acceptance, awareness...words I want to use to share. The nice thing is people do understand my "limited shares" so that's nice. And Poppi wants me to go to other meetings with him too. He says he wants all the alcoholics around here to know me, I want to go, I just don't like to go too often cause most of the meetings are 8-9:30pm, and it takes me along time to wind down in the evening, so I like to be home around 8pm. Uh oh how OLD do I sound ha ha!! But I want to get up early to exercise before starting my day...oh well, hell, the truth is I have become someone who likes to be home in the evening. I can write in my blog, chat in FB or on the phone with my kids. And now that I have discovered Magic Jack I can start calling friends in the states since it's free. Anyway I think I hear him pulling up so...gotta go.

I almost forgot! This morning I was SO happy when I looked at my stats for this blog and saw that whomever was looking at my blog from Russia is back! The stats showed the most views are from the United States, then Mexico, then Russia...then with way less hits, other countries including China, Japan, Poland, Germany, England, and several others I can't think of. But right when we moved up here the Russia views stopped, so it's been almost 2 months. But you're back! Yipee. I would love comments from anybody; I've had a few, but my daughter says it's hard to do, so ...oh well...anyway I just wanted to comment myself cause I was so happy to Russia back on my views list!
Cheers!

Yesterday turned out pretty darn good. I got to FB chat with Drewy for about 2 hours while she was working- which is why chat not talk- and then right as I was about to turn off my computer I saw a chat from Halla asking me to call her. She was in the city (San Francisco) with her friends hanging out but wanted to chat with her momma. So I called using wonderful Magic Jack so it was free, for about an hour. We talked about her friend who she's been trying to help get clean & sober, but admitting that she can't- that her friend has to chose it for herself. No matter how hard Halla tries, if her friend doesn't really really want it. not gonna happen. Halla promised me to go to some Alanon meetings, and also told me she really likes the AA meetings so I said well then keep going. She said she like that these people know how she feels- yep sweety- that's why it works. My Drewy needs a new job, she has been miserable at this one for more than a year. Funny but for me one nice thing is we can do this chat in the evening since she works 6pm-6am. But now that I wrote it- I realize if she had a different job that she felt better about, we would find another time to talk/chat, and she would be happier.

This morning Poppi took my car and got the new license plates. Unfortunately it cost more than 3000 pesos ($240 usd), but it takes what it takes. Actually after I finish this, I think I'll take my new ride for a little cruise. I'm not going out to the center today; now that I have a car I'm gonna try Tues-Thurs out there for teaching the kids. Karen (the director) and I will try to figure out what works, like age, or fluency, and then advertise the classes. Of course by advertise I mean, telling people at the center, not a newspaper ad ha ha.

I'm feeling really positive here. I'm sure it also has to do with trying to get into an exercise regime, cause exercising gets those endorphins moving, but also I have been working on my acceptance issues. That I cannot change people, that I can accept myself, work on myself, and be true to myself, but I cannot change anyone else, nor should I have judgements about where others are on their own paths. In the last couple of years I have changed. Especially the last year, including my isolation time in Playa Ventura. I am more comfortable in who I am and that I know I will always be ok. No matter what. In 2009 and the first part of 2010 I was so full of fear; that's when I had breast cancer, that's when despite what the doctors said, I thought I was gonna die. I made so any bad decisions. The worst of all being remarrying my ex. He is a wonderful man, but not the right man for me. Duh, that's why we got divorced. But in my fear, I accepted his help, and said yes when he asked me to marry him again. A few months later, I recovered. I mean, after treatment- chemo & radiation- I went to this boot camp in Utah and pushed myself to my limits, to beyond my limits...I started to believe I would be ok. Anyway I had stayed close to my AA program, and went to a support group for cancer survivors and started to believe. Well, I had remarried my ex out of selfish fear. So of course, it didn;t work. Hmmm shortest marriage ever- married in April and divorced in June. Then I got to deal with guilt & shame..good times....NOT. My kids were also disappointed, angry, with me. It took a lot longer for Halla to forgive me, but I think we are good now. Drew and I have been super close for a long time, and it just gets better with her.

I met Everardo when I was still married and he was also in a relationship. We were friends and always saw each other in a group (we're both in recovery so it was mainly at meetings). But he told me he saw me when I was bald, in chemo, and he liked what I had to say in meetings, but he could never get close to even chat cause I had my posse of women around me all the time ha ha. Both of our relationships tanked around the same time. I had hair again (ha ha) and had been out of treatment for 6 months or more. We had coffee at the Alano club and went to a couple of meetings together, both if us a little skittish after our respective break ups. After a couple of months we we went out to lunch...pretty safe right? Then a drive out to the coast...and in Sept, moved in together. A year later we were married, and a year after that, moved to Mexico, and here we are. This summer we will celebrate 3 years of marriage 4 of being together. But it took awhile for Halla to warm up to Everardo, I think cause she was still mad at me. But she was always polite and I liked that. Poppi was amazing; he always told me, let her be; she doesn't have to like me, she can decide for herself. She wants, she needs to be loyal to her father, and has to figure out for herself that she can have all of us in her life. My ex got married about a month after me, he married a woman from Jordan, a Palestinian like him. She even grew up in Kuwait like he did. I ope they will be very happy. It took a year after they got married to get her to the states. Hmmm maybe seeing her dad happy, seeing him get a new wife, maybe that helped Halla. I mean, she came to our wedding, and has been great with Everardo, but it took awhile. Last nite when she hung up, she said, tell Everardo I love him momma. I cried when I got off the phone.

After the girls went home after their visit here,  I was talking to Drewy on the phone, and she was crying cause she was so happy that Halla and I found each other again. She told me that Halla keeps it all inside, she doesn't share here feelings easily. Ooh another ah ha moment- yep this is why I write this diary..to get these moments. Maybe I read it wrong, all that time I thought Halla didn't forgive me, that somehow she blamed Everardo - maybe she just didn't express her feelings. I mean, she really opened up with me in such an honest way, her deepest feelings and fears. She told me things I won't share here since some of my family and friends read this, and Halla needs to share when and/or if she chooses, not me. I am so blessed, so grateful for her trust, I don't want to ever blow it. Anyway  I asked her if she shared with her dad, her sister, her best friends- but the answer was no. I was surprised, and encourage her to share with her sister, after all they are very close. Last nite Drewy told me that she keeps alot in, but she does share with her boyfriend, and I'm grateful for that. Well, maybe that's why Halla liked the AA meetings so much. She hears people sharing their innermost feelings; that she's not unique or weird with the way she thinks....hmmm maybe this is part of why I feel changed, that I am witnessing, no- I am a part of, my daughters growth. I am SO grateful for the relationships I have with them!

Well here's to having another great day! The sun is out, I love my family, yep- life is good. Viva!

A massage using only machines? yuck, did I say YUCK? Thank goodness it was only15000 pesos, (a little less than $13USD). We were coming home last nite after a great Spanish meeting (aa) and we saw this ittle place that had been saying massage, as low as 50 pesos had opened. So we stopped in, and the guy said $150 pesos so I came back a few minutes later in sweats all ready for a massage- which I have been wanting basically since we moved to Mexico. Cause I love a massage...ok I love a good massage. So this guy had me lay on my stomach and he used a series of "machine"s to massage my feet and legs. Basically vibrators like balls, and then a longer rotating one..Not hard enough or deep enough or even...I don't know, it was so clinical, like ooh whatch out don't actually touch my skin, oh and I kept all my clothes on so it was thru sweats. He said it was this new style of massage.Ad did I like it? I replied, well I have never had a massage with only machines and I like a deep tissue massage, so it wasn't my favorite. But good luck with it!

There was even  this little thing like a cap for your head, but it was these little spines that was supposed to be like fingers massaging your head? Why not simply use your fingers? I think a massage has to do with a person touching you, finding those spots that need a knot worked out in muscle, an air bubble pushed thru, etc. A masseuse (spelling?) a person who give massage can feel your tension, feel the places that give you trouble, or pain. This is what I was looking for. I had a place I went to back in Petaluma that I loved; they did a foot massage first, then the whole body. When I used to work in Thailand- I would go for a week at a time, I got used to Thai massage and loved it. I would get an hour of them separating my muscles from my bones ha ha and then a second hour of a softer massage putting me back together. After that back to my hotel for a hot shower and lobg nap. Oooh I miss that. Of course in Thailand all that was about $20USD, in the states a bit more eh? My ex-husband is a massage guy, and I have had a couple of massages from him and they were awesome. He had a partner who didn't work out too great as a partner, but gave a great massage.

Anyway I know there are great massages in Mexico, right here in Puerto Penasco and I will find them. Yesterday I got my nails done and the young lady spoke no English so we had a nice 2 hours trying to chat and she told me she knew soeone who did massage at the beach but will also come to your house and she thinks it's about $20US. She's gonna stop by when she finds the number; it's a client of hers- she also does hair. She's very convienent cause she is right arund the corner from here about half a block. So yesterday was a pretty nice day- nails, massage (ok yuck), a great meeting, went to the art fair at the Shrimp Park and visited with my friend Anda and her hubby, and...drove my new car around with Sam in the back seat!

Yep- got a car for me. Ok not new of course, a 99 Toyota Corolla, kinda grey in color, and pretty eat up , an "under the radar" car which is exactly what I wanted. Tomorrow we'll get the license plates; it's different here; the car has Sonora plates but when the seller goes to the DMV, they DMV takes the plates and then when we go to the DMV we are issued new ones. Maybe the same ones but Popi thinks they will be new ones...but we have 15 days to do it so we can drive it this weekend. We have to keep the paperwork with us to show we have the 15 days, but that's it. So today, in a few minutes, we'll take Sam and head for the beach- but actually I hope we take the truck for this since he will for sure go swimming. Hmmm I hope we go eat some tacos first, for breakfast, at a stand- the one we took the girls to last week- I love their tacos!Well maybe more later but Everardo is itchin' to get going so guess I better get a move on!